Join Dian Killian and discover the power of imagery and metaphor in deepening your empathy practice. This segment from her 6 session course explores how visualizing sensations, emotions, and needs through metaphorical language can enhance the connection during empathy guessing, particularly in somatic-based approaches.

When Dian works with managers, they often ask how they can manage others more effectively. She almost always asks them: how are you managing yourself?

This question applies to all aspects of life, both at work and at home. How are you: 1) gaining clarity around your needs; 2) managing your internal reactions; and 3) clarifying your requests before you open your mouth (or judge) others? This is why self-empathy – which Dian calls “self-management,” now a buzzword in business – is central to the practice of Nonviolent Communication.

Yet self-empathy is not always easy, especially if events in your life stimulate old, “fossilized” needs. These “fossilized” needs are often precognitive and connected to trauma, and as a result, “live” in your muscle memory. In order to fully release this “stuck” energy, it is necessary to engage your felt-sense while learning to empathize with your body and deeply connect with your younger parts.

Dian calls this process Somatic Self-Empathy (SEE).

Have you ever noticed how being heard in a deep, empathic way is like magic?

When we're deeply heard, our whole bodies relax. We return to equilibrium, we can breathe again, and access renewed curiosity, empowerment and choice. We also get a fresh perspective and new insights: like a fog lifting, we see ideas and solutions that evaded us before. And with that restored vision, we're able to find new ways to engage with others that, just moments earlier, seemed impossible or a chore. 

You can become an empathy wizard—with anyone, in any situation, including the most challenging!

Join Dian Killian to explore key concepts and practices, including new ways of seeing and practicing NVC, and learn all this through direct experience, via exercises, pair work, and role play. 

Puzzling about needs and feelings? Check out this excerpt from Dian Killian's course, Embracing the Body: Somatic Self Empathy, where she leads participants through an exercise that demonstrates how our physical sensations connect us to our feelings and needs.

Listen in as Dian shares her tips and sense of urgency around bringing NVC skills to work: 1) How to use your imagination (visualization!) to help you connect with somatic responses and needs; and 2) Five built-in advantages to sharing NVC in the work place.

• Learn your body’s “language” and how to listen deeply to it
• Expand your NVC toolbox with emergency self-empathy tips
• Explore drawing on your senses to get past what is blocking you
• Discover and practice that “missing step” in the NVC process

• Make use of felt-sense and somatic awareness to support faster and deeper shifts in yourself and others
• Master silent empathy to give more ease and flow in your empathy guessing
• "Streetify" your NVC practice by learning how to make your NVC practice more fluent, colloquial, and "natural" and match the person you're speaking with
• De-mystify empathy guessing by learning to identify key linguistic queues
• Build an "emergency empathy" tool kit---with "quick fixes" for challenging situations by using each step of the model for maximum effectiveness
• Interplay both the NVC "mindset" (consciousness/intention) and the NVC "tool kit" for greater ease, fluency and effectiveness