When someone offers continual unsoliticed feedback or advice, setting a boundary may not be easy if you care about how they might hear you. And if you don't set a boundary, you may eventually become resentful and say something you regret. Instead, here are six ways to respond, with varying degrees of effectiveness.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level Intermediate Skill Level
  • Duration 6-9 minutes
  • Date Added 1/2020
  • Premium Members

    N/A

  • Payee LaShelle Lowe-Charde
  • Points 3
  • Multi Trainer Num 1

Trauma and Sanctuary

with Bob Wentworth

One clue we have trauma is when we respond in a way we don't want (eg. being reactive, self sabotaging, etc). Even when we have high level NVC skills our trauma-related mechanisms can activate, and we can lose access to well honed NVC skills. Read on for approaches that involve healing trauma, and approaches that involve managing the effects of trauma and preventing additional trauma.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level All Skill Levels
  • Duration 3 - 5 minutes
  • Date Added 11/2009
  • Premium Members

    N/A

  • Payee Bob Wentworth
  • Points 1
  • Multi Trainer Num 1

Most of us subject ourselves to so many painful mental jabs and they seldom stimulate helpful change. We can be like a frustrated animal trainer repeatedly whipping an animal, without ever helping the animal to understand what behavior is wanted or offering encouragement. Instead, punishing thoughts can be stepping stones to awareness. We can focus on sensing what we're really aspiring to. This is more likely to eventually produce sustainable change that'll serve us better.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level Introductory Skill Level
  • Duration 4 - 6 minutes
  • Date Added 3/2009
  • Premium Members

    N/A

  • Payee Bob Wentworth
  • Points 2
  • Multi Trainer Num 1

The way we talk to one another, and think about or react to our lives, may seem "normal" but eventually, this may reach a point where we realize something isn't working, and we make adjustments. But often the suffering continues if we aren't addressing root causes. In studying NVC we can become more aware of what we are doing and its effects -- plus imagine and implement alternatives that lead to greater fulfillment for self and others.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level Introductory Skill Level
  • Duration 3 - 5 minutes
  • Date Added 7/2012
  • Premium Members

    N/A

  • Payee Bob Wentworth
  • Points 1
  • Multi Trainer Num 1

Perhaps human violence persists because we believe that violence is inevitable and there's nothing we can do about it -— even though there is notable evidence that this is likely not true. Read on for some research and theory on how cultures evolve to be collaborative or violent. Plus, learn benefits of collaboration and downsides to force, punishment, and control. These provide implications for how we might move towards a culture of more peace.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level Intermediate Skill Levels
  • Duration 8 - 12 minutes
  • Date Added 4/2016
  • Premium Members

    N/A

  • Payee Bob Wentworth
  • Points 3
  • Multi Trainer Num 1

Join Eric, as he reveals a clear path from heartbreaking intimate relationships to joyful, thriving intimate relationships. Eric uses his passion for helping singles heal from their past relationships, to help you to experience more ease, joy and mutuality in future relationships.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level Beginner Skill Level
  • Duration 45 minutes
  • Date Added 10/9/2012
  • Premium Members Premium Members
  • Payee Eric Bowers
  • Points 3
  • Multi Trainer Num 1

With abundant evidence that most people have unconscious biases against people --even when that bias runs counter to their own values-- there's a strong chance you recreate this disconnect with people far more often than you recognize. So even with a high degree of NVC skills you may behave in a way that seems "NVC" but also reproduces the painful patterns that marginalized people all-too-often experience. Read on for ways to transform pitfalls of NVC into more reliable connection.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level Intermediate Skill Levels
  • Duration 7 - 11 minutes
  • Date Added 8/2017
  • Premium Members

    N/A

  • Payee Bob Wentworth
  • Points 2
  • Multi Trainer Num 1

Self Responsibility

with Bob Wentworth

Being self-responsible is about empowerment — via noticing what is potentially in our locus of control, getting to know ourselves better, looking at our own role in how we experience life, and making conscious choices to act within our own power. This requires us to be mindful in relating our stories to our needs. Read on for more on this, and the various pifalls within thinking about self responsibility.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level Beginner Skill Level
  • Duration 6 - 9 minutes
  • Date Added 12/2011
  • Premium Members

    N/A

  • Payee Bob Wentworth
  • Points 2
  • Multi Trainer Num 1

Sometimes when we regard needs as something that could be met or unmet by another person or by a situation we unconsciously hold the belief that our needs should be met. Or we end up holding blame or implying wrongdoing. People are more likely to resist a request made from this stance. Instead, here are practices to increasingly losen any remaining attachment or demand energy -- and open our hearts to ourselves and others while we make requests.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level Beginner Skill Level
  • Duration 5 - 8 minutes
  • Date Added 10/2019
  • Premium Members

    N/A

  • Payee Peggy Smith
  • Points 2
  • Multi Trainer Num 1

Transforming Bias

with Oren Jay Sofer

Mindfulness is paying attention in a balanced and nonjudgmental way. To practice mindfulness is to uncover our own biases, revealing we less neutral and objective than we think. This takes great humility. Each time we become aware of our own unconscious biases and blind spots, our world expands. Read on for more about practices to help us see, and transform, our own biases.

Additional Info

  • Skill Level Intermediate Skill Level
  • Duration 5 - 8 minutes
  • Date Added 06/2018
  • Premium Members

    N/A

  • Payee Oren Jay Sofer
  • Points 2
  • Multi Trainer Num 1