What is self-empathy? Mary Mackenzie leads you on an exploration of self-empathy through an exercise that will show you how you can easily connect more deeply with your needs.

Learn how Nonviolent Communication (NVC) can improve the quality of your personal and professional relationships, one interaction at a time.

Trainer Tip: Oftentimes, when we mix an evaluation and observation, we promote defensiveness in other people. When we are able to separate the two, we are more likely to create opportunities to promote open dialogue about our concerns. Be aware of your evaluations and observations today.

Observation is the awareness of our sensory perceptions and thoughts, separate from evaluations and judgments. Feeling involves bodily sensations and emotions, distinct from "faux feelings" that mix thought and emotion. Needs encompass universal human requirements for survival and wellness, while thoughts and evaluations express needs. Requests are rooted in connection and invite true...

Trainer Tip: Love can be both a feeling and a need in Nonviolent Communication. It can be seen as a need if we do something to meet our need for love. We can also experience love as a feeling, just as warmth, affection, and excitement are feelings. Often, but not always, we can feel love and meet our need for love at the same time.

Trainer Tip: Are you meeting your needs for exercise? Consider which activities would help you meet your needs for physical and emotional health and fun, rather than focusing on what expert opinion says. If you feel overwhelmed and had a hard time sticking to the program feel free to tweak your program so that you enjoy it more.

Trainer Tip: Research shows long-term change comes when people have intrinsic desire to change. Extrinsic motivation is temporary and often only lasts while we're observed (eg. driving the speed limit when police are there). Notice where you're mostly intrinsically or extrinsically motivated. How does this feel? For instance, do you call mom because you want to connect with her? Or because...

One thing that makes empathic understanding difficult yet valuable is that it can be humbling. If I really open myself to hearing and understanding, while trusting my inner strength of self-knowing, I may be changed by what I hear. My core beliefs or understanding might change and grow. This openness could be key to transforming the energy of conflict into new possibilities for greater...

Communicating with a client or patient with a mental health diagnosis can be tough. This guidebook introduces Nonviolent Communication, helping you develop more clear, compassionate, mutual satisfaction and potentially create conditions that heal those who look to you for help. With this guide learn to notice when your approach is likely to trigger defense and how to shift that to more...

In this introduction to Nonviolent Communication (NVC), Wes Taylor discusses the two basic aspects of NVC, the consciousness and the tools that help manifest the consciousness.

This anecdote illustrates how a young man had the social awareness to consider how male conditioning may bring up competitiveness in his interactions with another man. The young man offered transparency and checked for consent in a way that shows an embodiment of power-with, togetherness, consideration, care, collaboration... and all without displaying any formal NVC training, and without...

Whether its pandemics, climate change, damage to the environment or other massive challenges that humanity faces, what are we to do if we can't agree on even the most basic information and knowledge? From empathic understanding we can focus on shared, universal human needs (where there is no conflict or disagreement) underlying our perceptions, and feelings. Then we can see if there are ways we...

Trainer Tip: We can voice our upset about a situation and still see the higher self in the other person. Honest expression can deepen connection and bring us closer to resolution and connection, when we're not judging them. To know that they're a spiritual being, but think they're an insensitive slob or egotistical bore, is a contradiction. Instead, look for the needs they want to meet. See the...

Two NVC trainers went into dangerous, war torn territory to share the skills they found so valuable but end up learning that they need to first apply those skills before those they came to help could receive what they had to offer. Only when the foundation of connection and trust was built could they mediate the conflicts using empathic communication.

Trainer Tip: It can be more productive and satisfying to focus on what we want than on what we don’t have or don’t like. What will help rectify the situation? What would you like someone to do now or next time? This can eliminate much of the emotional pain caused by berating yourself or others. The moment your focus is on what is wrong with your life or what's lacking, take a moment to shift it...

When speaking to decision makers about social change issues it helps to communicate with compassion, clarity, curiosity, calm, and respect while seeking to understand their needs. This way there’s a better chance for more trust and connection that’s crucial for a win-win strategy to come about. This may take several conversations.

Trainer Tip: In our effort to be heard, we often forget to listen. In fact, your need to be heard will not be met completely until you have heard how what you said affects the other person. If we want to ensure that we're heard we can ask the other person to reflect what they heard us say. And we can hear what's going on with them. It is important to remember that a dialogue is not complete...

Mismanaged emotional pain can compound and hurt ourselves and others. Four ways we can mismanage pain are: denial, blame, depression, and escape/numbing. This can result in hatred, resentment, discrimination, revenge, anger, and more problems. The fifth way we can deal with pain is to confront the pain acknowledging it and dealing with our unmet needs. This is a more direct path. Read on for...

There are many polarizing issues we can resist and fight over. The word "resistance" can mean fighting against what we don’t agree with in counterproductive ways. It can also be the illusion and futility of mentally fighting against reality of 'what is'. But acceptance, non-resistance, of what is doesn’t mean powerless resignation. Another way to resist is to accept and love whole-heartedly,...

Trainer Tip: Without knowing our feelings, its harder to live fully present, take care of ourselves, and make sound decisions. If its difficult for you to know what you feel and to express your feelings, consider reviewing a list of feelings, practice expanding your feelings vocabulary, and naming your feelings.