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  • 5

    Days

  • 8

    Hrs

  • 48

    Mins

Article

6 - 9 minutes

12/2011

Being self-responsible is about empowerment — via noticing what is potentially in our locus of control, getting to know ourselves better, looking at our own role in how we experience life, and making conscious choices to act within our own power. This requires us to be mindful in relating our stories to our needs. Read on for more on this, and the various pifalls within thinking about self responsibility.

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Article

3 - 5 minutes

01/2018

Listening is a cornerstone of dialogue and a powerful metaphor for spiritual practice. When we’re willing and able to listen, we open a conduit that allows connection and understanding to happen.

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What are the most powerful things I can do to build an inspired relationship? I answered the question with romantic relationships in mind; however, I believe the answer below applies to all important relationships.

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When deciding if someone crossed your boundaries and how to respond, you may get conflicting opinions on it. These opinions can be coarse attempts to manage life with rules about what should(n’t) happen. Instead, so that you can find where you want to invest your energy, ask yourself questions that reveal what for you is truly in integrity, nourishing, connects to your heart, and deepens self understanding. Read on for examples.
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Using real-life examples from class participants, Sylvia Haskvitz demonstrates the life-changing results of clarifying the needs underlying "shoulds." Some of the situations covered in this audio are:

  • A grandmother shares how she was able to spend time with her grandchildren even when experiencing estrangement from her daughter
  • A father examines how to repair a conversation with his daughter
  • A woman explores her "should" thinking about her financial stability, her job and grief regarding her husband's death
  • A woman connects to her deeper needs that arise with the statement "I should do my taxes"
  • A woman perceives that she has conflicting needs for family harmony, relaxation and comfort when deciding whether to spend holiday time with stepchildren

If your life is fraught with "shoulds," this resource will support you in translating them into needs and, in some cases, to let them go entirely.

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What is empowered speech and how does it link to interdependence? How do you speak in a way that increases the chances of being heard and creates space where individuals are more inclined to listen and act? In this excerpt from the 2021 course, Working Together for Change, Itzel and Kathy explore how to do this by integrating empowered speech, attuned speech, and a commitment to maintaining connections.
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When we apply and practice NVC over a number of months in an organization, it can create group norms that make learning go deep faster. These new norms can impact people's interactions with others both inside and outside of work. From here, there's potential for people to start seeing value when they share these skills and experiences. This may create a ripple effect of interest in applying NVC across different domains in life.

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The impulse to say "I love you" is an opportunity to check-in both with our level of presence (eg. are we saying it by rote?) and also with what we really mean in that moment (eg. what are the needs and real purpose deep beneath the word "love"?).  This can invite us to explore a deeper, more heartfelt way of communicating and being...

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Article

10 - 15 minutes

11/2013

The “mind” or our “ego” are often depicted as a static entity, an unchangable part of human nature, and as obstacles or negative parts of ourselves to overcome. This view creates maligning, a split within us, while remaining invisibly part and parcel of authority-based societies --the dominant culture and institutions into which we are born. Instead, I want to advocate an integration of reason and emotion, mind and heart, plus self and others.

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Trainer Tip

1-2 minutes

12/26/23

Trainer Tip: We can voice our upset about a situation and still see the higher self in the other person. Honest expression can deepen connection and bring us closer to resolution and connection, when we're not judging them. To know that they're a spiritual being, but think they're an insensitive slob or egotistical bore, is a contradiction. Instead, look for the needs they want to meet. See the spiritual being in everyone—even yourself.

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