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Article

9-13 minutes

07/14/2022

So often we're habituated to associate a “why” question with being reproached, blamed or shamed – and so defensiveness arises. However, in order to maintain a flow of understanding and collaboration, we need to hear and say the “why” while finding other ways to ask for it. Here we look at how to ask questions that bring each of us vital information that can open up discovery and learning, for our mutual benefit.

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Developing our own teaching exercises is a powerful consciousness-building process that eventually helps us clarify our own way of learning and to develop our unique style of teaching.

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One of the premises in NVC is that behind all behavior and expressions are Universal Human Needs as the deeper motivators. And one of the key distinctions in NVC is that between Needs and Strategies. Try Alan Seid's exercise called  "Peeling the Layers of the Onion, " a process for uncovering these needs — the deeper motivations — that underlie words and behaviors we may find disturbing or puzzling.

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Trainer Tip

1 - 2 minutes

10/2005

There are endless ways to meet our needs. Conflict occurs when we argue over strategies. When we actively value everyone’s needs, we foster openness and deeper connection in our relationships. Today look for opportunities to focus on needs in order to resolve an issue with at least one person.

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Within the pandemic, limitations of our market economies are more visible. Extreme need is exposed when the economy is collapsing and so many people are without jobs. We can now see how it’s possible to direct resources where they are most needed, solely out of care and interconnection. This is a call to explore a more viable way of living, that centers relationship over transaction.

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Is there someone you wish was more willing? Try guessing what obstacles they might be struggling with. And allow yourself to feel your grief. As you grapple with your own desire for someone to find their willingness, its essential to recognize that this is about you and your needs. You can also express your needs honestly, make requests for how to collaborate, and be responsive to what they want. Read on for more on this, plus four common ways someone’s willingness might be blocked.

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Welcome to the final video in our 3 part Embodied NVC Life Hack series. So far we've learnt about rewiring our brain from a flight, fright or freeze reaction to the choice of self-empathy, allowing us to centre and check-in with ourselves. In part two, Empathy Skills, we went beyond self-empathy to look at ways we can empathise with the other person. In this final instalment, we create a bridge from empathising to expressing.

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In times of stress, some part of you may still hold the belief that you can't be present for the stressor and survive. Some part of you may believe you have to go away. There are three things you can consider when attempting to intervene with the reactive pattern of shutting down: how you relate to the shutting down, access to self-confidence, and engagement. Read on for more.

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In this introduction to Nonviolent Communication (NVC), Wes Taylor discusses the two basic aspects of NVC, the consciousness and the tools that help manifest the consciousness.

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Creating a trusting connection and keeping the line of communication open are the primary prerequsites for giving feedback as a supervisor. Listen to Miki work with a course participant to ready herself for an upcoming feedback session.

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