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  • 5

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  • 8

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  • 48

    Mins

Practice Exercise

10 minutes

09/11/2018

This ten question exercise will help build your feelings vocabulary. It is helpful to differentiate between words that describe what we think others are doing around us, and words that describe actual feelings. These "faux feelings" often reveal more about how we think others are behaving than what we are actually feeling ourselves. Feeling words are always about us, not the other person.

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Kelly Bryson, CNVC Certified Trainer known for teaching people how to live authentically, focuses this audio on honesty: how to express what you're most afraid to say, when honesty is the best choice to support connection and how to employ "naked" honesty.

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Grief is often confused with anguish. Anguish is a painful feeling that comes along with deep resistance to an experience or truth. Grief that leads to healing is an expansive state. It is a willingness to be with an experience and truth. If you're not resisting grief, then it's a neutral-to-pleasant experience. Pleasant sensations can include a sense of space and relief as something is integrated and tense holding releases.

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Listen to Mary Mackenzie as she focuses on her opening premise for group participation, which lays the foundation for developing vibrant groups and then defines the facilitator’s role, which is often not known or incorrectly defined.

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Trainer Tip: Have you heard the saying, “If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it”? Communication is like that too. Don’t try to adjust your communication and behaviors if they already work for you.

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Practice Exercise

3 -5 minutes

05/05/2022

To learn to identify and speak from your needs requires specific tasks and practices. Here's a list of 10 learning tasks and practices for you to choose from. Some of these ideas include using needs cards and lists, working backwards from strategies and ideal scenarios, reflecting on past experiences and relationships, and asking for/offering/exchanging empathy.

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Join LaShelle Lowe-Chardé as she shares a story that beautifully illustrates how boundaries are akin to consciously directing our precious energy. She artfully expands upon this concept by highlighting that life-serving boundaries embody the wisdom of discernment.

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There are ways to reduce obstacles to setting boundaries. Notice unconscious ways you sacrifice yourself in order to avoid boundary setting. List of signs that a life-serving boundary is needed, but you're denying this. Realizing you consistently abandoned your needs may require time to process and mourn before you can set boundaries consistently. With practice, you can recognize boundaries care for yourself and others.

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Trainer Tip: People tend to look, act, and sound softer when they have been more fully heard. If you're unsure whether someone has been heard and you want to be cautious, you may ask them, “Is there anything else you’d like me to hear?”. If you try to reason with or educate them before they're heard, they'll likely respond negatively. After they're heard, you may notice a willingness on their part to listen and proceed.

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Trainer Tip

3 - 5 minutes

Circa 2007

Ask the Trainer: "At one point in my practice, it was brought to my attention that some people find the use of 'formal NVC' off-putting, or mechanical. Do you have any input or insight into this?"

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