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In pandemic many are asked to stay home. If we are experiencing violence at home we're also most at risk of harm or death if we leave. There are also less visible pieces at work. In this situation, acknowledging our pain, needs and experience can lighten the internal load to meet what is real, and claim our truth. We can do the same for our kids. This can open more pathways forward, and provide strength to leave when its more viable.

The human brain is a conservative organ that comprises different systems with varying degrees of conscious awareness, which evolved in three basic stages of human history (the lizard-squirrel-monkey brain.) In my understanding, we could say, the brain has strong needs for understanding, order, predictability and meaning. In fact, one of its key functions is to process experiences, and predict what the world is like, in order to maximize survival.  CNVC Certified Trainer Stephanie Bachmann Mattei explores the biological basis of our inner jackal voices.

The human species is trained and habituated towards separation. This model encourages humans to either give up on their needs or fight for their needs. In this short video, Miki shares how increasing capacity shifts habits of separation and supports holding of all needs.

An anchor awakens parts of you that can access a bigger perspective. Also, it can reduce your reactivity, increase conscious relating, and support self-compassion. An anchor helps you get a little bit bigger than the reactivity you are experiencing so that you can access a wiser discernment. It is simple, and can be done anytime and anywhere. Learn to direct your attention to develop your anchor in self-empathy.

Trainer Tip: It's up to us to get our own needs met. Mary offers some encouraging tips to do just that!

Because we affect one another it can be hard to know where to take responsibility and where to leave it with the other person. This means we need self empathy, and presence for another's struggles without compulsion to "make them happy" or bring them healthy change. You can then attend to the needs and to your choice about if and how you want to contribute with compassion. Respect them as autonomously in charge of their unique process of change. With this, you honor your life and theirs. And where, what, and how you will invest your precious life energy.

Trainer Tip: Knowing the difference between what we need and what we want someone else to do about that need can have a profound impact on our relationships and our happiness.

CNVC Certified Trainer Jeff Brown explains that it's truly easy to begin bringing NVC to your workplace. Start internally and avoid using NVC as a structured or "right" way to speak.

What do you experience when you give up on needs that are important to you, and are coerced into doing something you didn’t want to do? And why is it hard to make requests? Listen in and learn more.

In most business environments, purpose holds a higher priority than connection. Listen to Miki discuss the strategy of using minimum connection to remain true to the purpose at hand, and how the purpose of empathy may differ in the workplace.