Browse the NVC Library

Learn to recognize four forms of thinking and speaking that are likely to lead to disconnection.

Even those who practice NVC can repeat old patterns of thinking, believing, feeling, and behaving. If they do, but still use ‘NVC language’ others may think the issue is NVC rather than the person’s capacity. This week, notice even a small instance where someone is against something you suggest. To build trust and connection, experiment with offering empathy or asking them to share what they think, feel, or need.

What is it that enables us to thrive? How can we influence our capacity to live a meaningful and fulfilling life? Join Jim and Jori Manske in this exciting telecourse recording on the intersection of NVC and cutting-edge Positive Psychology, the science of human thriving.

• Ask the Trainer: “I would like some suggestions on how to interact with a member of the practice group I started. This individual speaks and acts in a manner I interpret as angry and controlling.”

Trainer Tip: Without knowing our feelings, its harder to live fully present, take care of ourselves, and make sound decisions. If its difficult for you to know what you feel and to express your feelings, consider reviewing a list of feelings, practice expanding your feelings vocabulary, and naming your feelings.

Sometimes there are moments when empathy has no effect at all on one another.  Why?  One reason could be that our brains maybe less receptive because of unseen forces that affect our nervous system and relationship to others...

Kelly Bryson and Christine King engage in a role play about how to stay connected to a friend whose persistent jackal voices tell her that she is worthless and her life is hopeless.

In this lively video, veteran trainer, Liv Monroe, introduces the NVC mascots of jackal and giraffe by detailing what they represent and how they are used to teach NVC dialogue to others. Many examples of jackal expression are used throughout the video.

Differentiation is being who you are in the presence of who they are. Its a process of connecting to and honoring your own experience, acting in integrity with your values, and engaging in collaboration with others to meet needs. If you're happier when you are not in an intimate relationship you may have developed your individuality but likely have difficulty with differentiation. Learn core skills and behaviors that support differentiation.

Trainer Tip: The world’s people are consuming more of earth's resources at an astronomical speed. This is a form of violence, of not valuing everyone’s needs. Respect and support everything that lives, including yourself. How you can take less from earth’s resources and replenish more so that earth can flourish? Even if its small, take action today to support earth’s sustainability.