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Oren Jay Sofer

Article

9-13 minutes

9/2/2021

Transform arguments with these steps: take responsibility for your mind, increase your capacity for discomfort, slow down, show up and remember your values, offer understanding, take risks, and speak from your heart. Learning new skills takes time, energy and effort. However, it’s entirely possible to…
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LaShelle Lowe-Chardé

Article

5 - 7 minutes

9/18/2021

There are five aspects helpful to consider when creating conditions and atmosphere where you can be heard deeply and hear others deeply: context, self-connection, autonomy, security, and specific requests. Read on for more, and reflect on moments when you have been heard deeply and name…
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Dian Killian

Article

6 - 9 minutes

9/1/2021

When we apply and practice NVC over a number of months in an organization, it can create group norms that make learning go deep faster. These new norms can impact people's interactions with others both inside and outside of work. From here, there's potential for…
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LaShelle Lowe-Chardé

Article

4-6 minutes

9/2/2021

The attention you enjoy may not be motivated by true caring for you. There are three key questions that can help you discern whether you are receiving care or charm: How does caring show up under duress? How are differences treated? How consistent is the…
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In treating everyone the same, we perpetuate inequities. If we want NVC consciousness to spread globally, it's crucial to acknowledge how various demographics are have varying capacities, and are differentially perceived, treated and impacted. Modifying our NVC teachings can increase equity and reduce the frequent…
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LaShelle Lowe-Chardé

Article

5 - 7 minutes

09/2019

When someone doesn't want to talk some options include releasing your attachment to the strategy you want, asking about and affirming with empathy their reasons for not talking, looking for what support could be helpful to shift to more openness, letting go, and grieving. Read…
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Oren Jay Sofer

Article

4 - 6 minutes

02/24/2021

While someone is upset or hurt they may "listen" to us to gather evidence for a rebuttal, to assert or validate a preconceived idea, and so on. When in this "predatory listening" mode, the "listener's" needs overshadow relational values like understanding, connection, or mutuality. In…
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LaShelle Lowe-Chardé

Article

8 - 12 minutes

8/2021

To help you stay connected to yourself and the other person when in challenging discussions about COVID-19 vaccines or other hot issues, without labeling others as reactive or otherwise, you can begin by tracking signs of your own reactivity to bring mindfulness onboard, then shifting…
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Eddie Zacapa

Article

2-3 minutes

1/2015

This sheet lists and describes 13 life serving strategies, such as: Time out, disengage, honesty check, and engaging in a working recovery plan. Read on for more.
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LaShelle Lowe-Chardé

Article

3 - 5 minutes

2/2021

Where do you feel desperation, resentment, anger about your partner's choices? What do you want to demand of them? Rather than looking for what they're suppose to do, look for your feelings and needs, how would you would respond if you trusted your needs could…
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