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The human needs that we all share are the foundation of the Nonviolent Communication (NVC) process because it is in connecting to needs that we find inner freedom, empowerment and compassion.
Using her own and participants' examples, Inbal illuminates parents on where they might be struggling with connecting to their children's needs, especially in situations where the children are responding to the parent's request.
Audio
1 hour, 3 minutes
The Compass – Arnina Kashtan's in-depth transformational process – is specifically designed to support you in reliably deepening your understanding of your own and others' conditioning, and finding ways to reclaim your full connection with yourself.
What do I do when I'm leading an NVC group and get emotionally triggered? Mary Mackenzie offers tips to respond with care and connection from her extensive experience leading NVC groups.
How we deal with “no” is a litmus test of our state of consciousness around power. Listen as John works with participants as they learn to give and receive a "no" from a consciousness of interpersonal connection.
Unappreciated, Judged, Disrespected, Offended, Manipulated... people use these words to describe feelings but these are all words that describe interpretations instead. They're also words that get people's backs up. Talk about unproductive! The solution? Develop a vocabulary of feelings so you can minimize defensiveness in others and facilitate connection.
How much money to pay? And how much money to ask for? The supply and demand logic basically say that we ask for the most that “the market can absorb” and pay “the least that we can get away with.” We can instead, we can engage in experiments that focus on connecting to and satisfying needs. We can also engage with our varying degrees of access to resources within the existing economy and...
Anger is a sign that you're resisting what's happening because you perceive an overwhelming threat, not trusting yourself to handle what's happening directly. Vulnerable feelings under anger are usually fear, hurt, or grief. Experiencing and expressing these feelings and connecting them to your needs, gives you access to more skill, insight, compassion, and wisdom. Read on for 3 questions to...
A challenge is an expansion of making a clear, positive doable request — and, when given, the person feels deeply seen by the challenger. A challenge isn't just about getting someone to take action on something important to them; it's a fierce form of empathy that supports people in connecting with their life force, and integrates it into their lives with action. A real challenge is tied to the...
The regeneration movement employs practices for healing our planet from damage, and boosting Earth sustainability. Environmental and social degradation is deeply connected -- as it comes from the same extractive, exploitive mindset of economic and related systems. Connecting with universal consciousness and needs underlying conflicts, we connect with commonality of all planetary life. This...
How excited do you get about connecting with people who are proving themselves right and who act like they know it all? Do you prefer the company of not-knowers who are in awe of the mystery of life and exploring with humility and innocent curiosity? Masking our vulnerability in not-knowing can point to deep wounds inside us, where perhaps the common denominator is our desire to prove our worth.
Many people consider a true observation as something that all can agree on. Some people use the video camera analogy – a true observation is “what a video camera can see and hear.” This perpetuates the myth of the neutral, unbiased observer. There are three layers of observation: External, Internal, and Systemic. Understanding these layers is key to connecting with the depth of the needs, and...
Grow your compassionate presence with this 3-process exercise. The processes include: Connecting to and feeling the Life Impulse meditation, Creating your own inner space of compassionate presence exercise, and the Compassionately Embracing visualization. These processes will guide you toward deeper self connection and compassionate presence.
Article
6 - 9 minutes
Interrupt cycles of conflict by creating a new ways forward. You can do this by connecting with the energy of the met needs you want in the dynamic; guessing the other person's needs; naming your needs; asking essential questions; identifying at least three different strategies to meet each need; and imagining the positive outcome.
The Compass – Arnina Kashtan's in-depth transformational process – is specifically designed to support you in reliably deepening your understanding of your own and others' conditioning, and finding ways to reclaim your full connection with yourself.
Some arguments stay stuck because each person thinks it's about the content of the argument, rather than the needs each person is attempting to protect. When the needs get attached to the strategies a "no way out" scenario gets created. Instead, fully step into one another's worlds and connect to the feelings and needs behind the strategy each party is putting forth. Read on for six elements to...
How we choose to communicate can either open or shut down connection. We express ourselves through our bodies, so no matter how ‘nicely’ we offer words, if they are not aligned with our energy, they won’t be congruent. This session will offer simple yet powerful tools to connect to your needs and others' needs, allowing more authentic words that are imbued with care.
Someone may give more weight to your ideas, decisions, and directives based on your experience and what you've learned. This could influence them to project their ideals, fears, hopes, and more onto you. In this case, you can help transform this and contribute to their connection to their own agency, authenticity, and self-trust -- while supporting their ability to learn from what you have to...
In this brief introduction to The Work from Byron Katie, Arnina shows the connection of The Work to Nonviolent Communication. Arnina points out how the first two questions of The Work correspond to the observation step of the NVC process, and invites us into deeper self-inquiry.
Let's look at the resources, awareness, and skills needed to ask for emotional attunement, celebration, relatedness, perspective, understanding, advice, and information. This includes expressing appreciation for what's supporting your needs, strengthening a sense of worthiness, and awareness of your reactivity and intention. Plus, making requests that are clear, specific, doable and creates a...