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Dear friends,

My book, Peaceful Living: Daily Meditations for Living with Love, Healing and Compassion has been on my mind a lot lately. It turns 20 years old next year, which I feel joyful about. Along the way, I came across this meditation that I wanted to share with you:

November 26
Change your thoughts and you change your world. – Norman Vincent Peale

Developing Tolerance

I used to think that Chihuahuas were dumb dogs and bulldogs were ugly. Then one of my friends bought a longhaired Chihuahua named Tilly and another bought an English bulldog named Emma. Once I got to know these dogs and could see how truly sweet they are, it didn’t take long for me to fall in love with both of them.

Discover your unique role in creating a world where everyone’s needs matter.

Listen to three interwoven tales of love, vulnerability, courage and healing by CNVC Certified Trainer and Storyteller Leo Sofer.

Using his own life experience, Eric explores why we need support from others, what support might look like, and what blocks us from asking for support for our relationships.

Trainer Tip: Q: How do we get the love we want? A: Ask for it.

“Nonviolence” is not just a political tactic. It is a “soul force,” a courageous and compassionate stand in the face of what seems to us unjustly unequal, oppressive, and violent. It is the force of love meeting and transforming what appears to not be love.. It is the force of love meeting and transforming what appears to not be love. It is speaking and listening with courage, compassion, and an open heart and mind and rooted in our truth in a way that bridges understanding. And doing so without demand nor trying to convince -- all in the face of any anger, fear, oppression, inequality, violence or disagreement.

Delve into the power of forgiveness with Rodger Sorrow! Listen in as Rodger explores 3 areas: asking for forgiveness, when it's hard to forgive, and forgiving ourselves.

Mourning, grief and celebration is a way to connect with what we love and want to honor.  In this trainer tip we learn that these three things can become a way for us to understand our emotions regarding our losses and appreciations.

If someone asks you to love them as is, try wondering what contributes to their need for acceptance. Loving someone and empathizing with them, doesn't mean you can't make requests for change. Recall that your requests are about your needs, not about them. Understand that requests may not be met due to lack of resources or skills, even if the desire is there. Clarify how important the request is to you and how negotiation can look.

NVC is a process. It’s the willingness and effort to empathize with both sides of a conflict, encouraging each side to empathize with the other, and then seeing what solution can arise, working together to meet the needs of both sides. Empathy is the experience of being not separate as well as being an individual. It's seeing we're all part of the one ever-flowing consciousness of being, all unique expressions of this unity.

Trainer Tip: To reduce defensiveness and hurt feelings when talking to your partner about your sexual needs that haven't been met, keep the conversation focused on your needs, not her lack of skill, and make a very specific request. From there, you can both explore any shared needs, blocks, or support needed to bring you both closer to your needs.

• Reclaim the lost voices of your ancestors
• Understand the impact of collective trauma on your family line
• Open yourself up to have more warmth for yourself and your children
• Restore the flow of love and energy from past generations

• Celebrate and nurture your relationship to the Earth — and each other! 
• Explore your connections to family, partner, work, nature, self and more 
• Discover new ways to grow in community and work together to make this world a better place  
• Engage and immerse yourself in NVC while making new friends! 

Dear friends,

Happy April Fool’s Day, which, according to Wikipedia, “is an annual custom on April 1st consisting of practical jokes and hoaxes.” I always think of my Mom on April Fool’s Day. She was mostly a stern person who scorned practical jokes, but on April Fool’s Day, she would play hoaxes on my father. One year, she...

Trainer Tip: We all want to be valued in our totality, to be loved even when we make mistakes. Wouldn’t we also like to offer this to ourselves? Compassion is about seeing the humanness in everyone, including ourselves. One way to express compassion is to remember your entire relationship and history of love with someone as a whole, rather than focusing on one disappointing incident.

Read how an American Buddhist NVC teacher with Jewish roots reflects on how any dehumanization in the Israel-Hamas conflict can be used to justify all kinds of violence that can escalate for generations. With acknowledgment of the complexities, his desire is for us to bring in respect, dignity and peace -- for both Israelis and Palestinians. He emphasizes compassionate advocacy of all humanity amid the ongoing crisis.

Here are seven self inquiry questions. Half of them can help you assess your NVC consciousness. The other half can help you move from pain, fear, resistance, judgement, criticism, and shame – to love, compassion, understanding, appreciation, curiosity, and more.

Inbal Kashtan reflects on poverty and how empathy can help build a peaceful, inclusive world.

Have you ever gotten a fishing line all tangled up? You got so frustrated you just started yanking on the different loops of line, which of course made the knots and tangles even tighter and more difficult to untangle. Wouldn’t it be great if you could notice the minute you were starting to tangle things up in a discussion with your loved one?

Trainer Tip: When looking to create healthier habits for your body, consider what needs those habits support -- such as integrity, nurturing, or love. Then consider the ways your body supports your life, and if you want to live in harmony with your body. If you make loving your body as natural as brushing your teeth or making your bed in the morning, you can bring deeper peace into your life.