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It may be challenging to hear or make requests when you feel shame regarding anyone's feelings and needs. Without support, shame could be debilitating, so you may feel resistant and become defensive, hear threat, or criticize others. Instead, be with people who allow space for vulnerability. Find ways to celebrate, negotiate, be mindful, accepting, and creative.

Trainer Tip: The very process of giving someone space to talk about their issue without our judgment, to be truly understood by us, and to be deeply heard is very healing, enough so that most people will organically find their own creative ways to resolve their issues. Rely on this process and you will lose all desire to fix people’s problems. Try this out today.

Our "felt-sense" can provide crucial information about our experience and our lives. It can also help us integrate and retain information. This can also bring greater access to internal resources, choice, open heartedness, collaboration and creative solutions. From there, profound insight and transformation can follow. Here's how we can harness that...

We can trick ourselves into keeping the status quo, feeling unworthy, and blocking access to critical awareness necessary that allows for new creative solutions to emerge -- when we think in terms of who has "earned" or “deserved” what.

There are three things you can do to sort inner conflict and make doable, sustainable agreements with yourself. This capacity can build trust with yourself to follow through, and to develop diverse and creative solutions -- thereby increasing confidence and ease.

In learning how to re-invent the economic system so that it distributes resources in a way that includes as many people's needs as possible, we would need to be in a process of mutual influence with one another. However, addressing resource distribution can be complex when people in different social locations have 1.)a different sense of what's considered "enough" 2.) different capacities to...

When there's quality connection then collaboration and creativity generosity of heart can come. Then strategies honoring everyone’s needs are easier. This requires us to trust connection, hear needs, brainstorm, experiment, prepare, and hold confidence that everyone’s needs can be met. Needs-based negotiation starts there. What derails this? Feeling urgency, listening from our (dis)likes or...

Here's a brief anecdote showing how one woman was able transform a situation, where a man was about to assault or rape her. She responded in a creative way that lead them both to see each others' humanity -- navigating them both to safety. As part of her ingenuity he ended up spending the night in her house, in another room.

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Practice Exercise

2 pages

This exercise is most often the first activity in a beginning level workshop after the usual logistics/history/check-in. Penny Wassman experiences it as an opportunity for people to build connection with one another.

Kelly Bryson, veteran and loved CNVC Certified Trainer, brings decades of experience to help you jumpstart your Mastery of Fear by using his unusual blend of experiential exercises, humor, empathy, original songs and stories, transformational truth telling, creativity and FRED (Frequency Resonation Energy Dynamics).

When we take a leap in life and put our hearts out into the world in new or bigger ways—sharing a song, dance, or poem, writing a book, competing at a sporting event, giving a speech, and so on—there is greater potential for aliveness but also for shame and pain

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Trainer Tip

3 - 5 minutes

Ask the Trainer: "I feel a lot of fear or nervousness about approaching a neighbor who uses 'wastebasket talk.' Once she's engaged, there are only two techniques that interrupt the flow: leaving or interrupting."

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Trainer Tip

3-4 minutes

The regeneration movement employs practices for healing our planet from damage, and boosting Earth sustainability. Environmental and social degradation is deeply connected -- as it comes from the same extractive, exploitive mindset of economic and related systems. Connecting with universal consciousness and needs underlying conflicts, we connect with commonality of all planetary life. This...

Judgment is an attempt to protect from hopelessness or insecurity, at high cost. Instead, check in with fear, grief, or hurt. Then wonder what needs are at stake for everyone. This makes space for grief instead of anger, for negotiation rather than control, and for "calling in" rather than excluding. Wonder: “For whom would this be life-serving or not?”, “What strategies would care for all...

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Trainer Tip

1 - 2 minutes

Trainer Tip: Here are four Stages of Emotional Maturity, also known as Stages of Emotional Liberation. Be aware of what stage of emotional maturity you are in today. And, celebrate it.

Although we are evolutionarily designed for collaborating with others when attending to our basic needs, the weight of the systems and cultural messages we have inherited interfere. Many of us are doubtful that collaboration is possible or effective, and most of us lack both the faith and the skills to live collaboratively, regardless of cultural imperatives. Miki helps us navigate this terrain.

In this book excerpt, Kathleen and Jared offer a path to reach deeper clarity, distinguishing between universal needs and strategies.

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Trainer Tip

1 - 2 minutes

When we ask something of a person and threaten negative repercussions if she doesn’t comply, we're making a demand. Demands limit the possible responses and reduce joyful participation. Instead, look to find mutually satisfying resolutions. And look for ways to change your demand into a request. Read on for more.

Listen and learn how to: Talk about NVC in a way that has meaning and relevance for companies and organizations, showing a clear ROI (return on investment). Draw on different applications of NVC for the workplace: addressing change in management, management issues / styles, morale / teamwork, employee retention, etc. Create a value-based training proposal (with different service and product...

We invite you to dive into this voyage, where you and Robert will swim ever deeper into the Spiral of Life, coming face-to-face with your divine Life Force – that essential living energy that permeates all.