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What do you do when you are thinking that it's not "emotionally safe" to speak honestly?  Join CNVC Certified Trainer Arnina Kashtan as she explores this topic with a workshop participant.

If we befriend our fear we cannot be paralyzed by it. Every fear that arises is a moment to increase our capacity. Fear is connected to something that is precious to us. We also can see what we do to numb our pain and how we try to avoid it. This knowledge can help us to choose healthier strategies to deal with our fears.

Three things can be helpful to practice when you want to contribute to someone caught in repetitive fears: self empathy, allowing grief for what you wish was true and is not, and empathy for their difficulty. You can also ask them what's helpful.

In thinking about your relationship with fear and doubt, see what happens when you ask yourself "What do you trust?”. Here's an example response to that question, and how it can open new perspective, soften fear, and bring trust to new depths.

Miki responds to a participant’s question concerning fear of consequences when speaking with a manager at work. In this excerpt, she delves into the topic of choosing to inhabit nonviolence in the workplace, affirming that fear and nonviolence are incompatible, and that nonviolence is a powerful alternative to our habitual Fight, Flight, Freeze responses.

CNVC Certified Trainer Arnina Kashtan tells us to look to our inner dialogue and the other's needs when we're feeling fear of physical violence that's been stimlated by someone's anger.

We can shift from being absorbed and identified with our inner chatter and feelings to being the space of awareness of these things. Observe your breath. Then observe your mind generating thoughts. Next, feel sensations of your body, particularly the difficult ones. Now, connect with the underlying energy of needs. Ask your unconscious mind for universal needs words related to what you now notice, think and feel.

In pandemic we can notice where we seek security. For some, financial systems that seemed to offer security have suddenly become unpredictable. For others, living without such privilege, resources are even more difficult to access. And we become more vulnerable to illness and death. These changes can trigger fear, but also motivate choices that contribute to a sense of security. Read on for more.

CNVC Certified Trainer Miki Kashtan shares how Marshall Rosenberg helped her see how unacknowledged fear can be misinterpreted as aggression and offers an elegant and simple strategy for changing this dynamic.

In this brief video, CNVC Certified Trainer and Inner Relationship Focusing Guide and teacher, Gina Cenciose, teaches that our inner relationship is the basis for both Focusing and NVC work.

In the face of stress you can find ways to be present for what’s happening, rather than being pulled or pushed around by anxious thoughts or fearful feelings. Here are some strategies to return to and maintain expanded awareness.

Empathy alone can be unreliable in guiding compassionate action. As seen in historical events, military training, personal anecdotes, and scientific experiments, empathy alone may not prevent people from harming others. A sense of duty or obedience, often instilled through fear of punishment and shame, might inhibit empathic action. The antidote may be to fostering empathy without resorting to control, shame, or punishment.

When was the last time you were in a situation with an overwhelming feeling of shame or an unnerving fear of 'doing it wrong'? Sometimes we get sweaty palms or a dry mouth, maybe we freeze on the spot or start an unhelpful internal monologue that makes the situation feel even worse. In this months NVC Life Hack Gesine takes a closer look at her own experience with shame and the fear of doing it wrong.

Trainer tip: Feelings of hurt, anger, fear, and resentment can often sound alike. Fear and excitement have the same physiological effects on us, and are often expressed in the same body language. Clearly and specifically naming our emotions and the intensity level can help us resolve conflicts, with a much greater opportunity to get our needs met.

In listening to what our emotions tell us, and embracing what we do not know, we begin the path of courage. Even though our culture tells us not to, revealing our imperfections is where we can deeply connect. Living our lives more courageously honest, can shift us towards inspiring one another. Read on for how some people experienced this in coming together to transform one woman's heroine addiction.

Trainer Tip: If you are motivated by fear, guilt, blame or shame, your actions will usually be motivated by avoiding pain. The best way to experience permanent, lifelong change is to focus on how your life will improve when you make a change. Notice when you attempt to motivate yourself and others with guilt, blame, or shame today, and then look for motivations that enrich life instead.

Join Jori and Jim Manske to explore, learn and practice the art of receiving the word "no," re-framing it from fear into fun.