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Healthy differentiation is key to personal growth, learning and thriving relationships. When healthy differentiation is present, you can discern what's true for you and what you are and aren't responsible for in an interaction, and can be fully who you are in the presence of others. There are a number of ways you can become aware of and cultivate healthy differentiation. Let’s look at two here: self-connection and autonomy.

Here are 14 more key differentiations that are not, at time of publishing this, on the CNVC key differentiations list. They can be used to support people who are on the path of learning and integrating NVC in making sense of their own understanding of their journey and where they are within it. And it can be used to support people who share NVC with others in offering brief information in support of understanding and learning.

When a relationship has both differentiation and bonding you can express differences and unmet needs, and responsibly do your own thing without it being a threat to the bond with another. You honor each others choices. There's trust rather than a sense of resentful obligation. Needs-based negotiation is easier. See if you tend to emphasize only differentiation or bonding in your relationships. Imagine how to support the opposite.

Differentiation is being who you are in the presence of who they are. Its a process of connecting to and honoring your own experience, acting in integrity with your values, and engaging in collaboration with others to meet needs. If you're happier when you are not in an intimate relationship you may have developed your individuality but likely have difficulty with differentiation. Learn core skills and behaviors that support differentiation.

Differentiation means you can access both autonomy and intimacy in relationships. When you're unafraid to lose yourself or be controlled, you can feel deeply connected and affected, while standing strong in yourself. Differentiation also means ability to tolerate disharmony and differences, self-soothe, offer compassion, and set boundaries. Here, we'll focus on setting boundaries with monitoring eye contact and physical interaction, and interrupt our "helping".

If you ask for or give empathy and are met with accusations of codependency, there are a number of things you can do to check that you are coming from a place of healthy differentiation. You can see if you're doing so from a place of healthy differentiation -- and notice signs of healthy differentiation when you offer empathy. You can also bring a profound respect for differences, and clear boundaries. Read on for more.

Veteran CNVC Certified Trainer, Sylvia Haskvitz, reviews the key distinctions (sometimes referred to as the key differentiations) in Nonviolent Communication.

Trainer tip: When we focus on needs further possibilities are more likely to open up. When we focus on a particular strategy, our world can feel scarce and conflicts can arise. Resolution comes when we value everyone’s needs and seek mutually satisfying solutions. We can ask for support towards this outcome.

Is it tough to see a loved one go through hardship? May you have tension building up inside and draw a rigid boundary, or feel the urgency to swoop in and try to “rescue” them with advice, consoling, cheering up, analyzing, or explaining? Instead, relax your body. Invite your emotions to flow with acceptance. Notice inner peace and expansion. See this person as someone on a journey to awakening with all its painful and joyful twists and turns.

Roxy Manning shares some strategies to support a child's natural curiosity when asking questions about physical differences using NVC skills.

Roxy Manning shares some strategies to support a child's natural curiosity when asking questions about physical differences using NVC skills.

How do you bring empathy and authenticity to uncomfortable work situations when there are so many layers of difference – especially if your primary reason for working is to feed your family and pay your bills? Listen in as Roxy opens participants' eyes to some of the many layers of difference we all deal with on a daily basis.

Trainer Tip: Knowing the difference between what we need and what we want someone else to do about that need can have a profound impact on our relationships and our happiness.

Join CNVC Certified Trainers Inbal Kashtan and Roxy Manning, for a passionate and intimate exploration of how NVC can support personal and social transformation in the area of power relations and social divisions.

Ask the Trainer: "Could you share a list of types of requests, with examples of each and a possible strategy for formulating requests in conversation?"