Search the NVC Library

• Celebrate and nurture your relationship to the Earth — and each other! 
• Explore your connections to family, partner, work, nature, self and more 
• Discover new ways to grow in community and work together to make this world a better place  
• Engage and immerse yourself in NVC while making new friends! 

• Learn concrete tools for engaging with others as you embrace individual and collective liberation
• Find your own source of choice even in the face of challenges
• Release the constriction of scarcity
• Find an empowered option to respond to what is happening in our world
• Open the door to the possibility of thriving rather than merely surviving

Trainer Tip: At least once today celebrate yourself and your progress, every step of it. We all have a starting point. No matter where you are in your life, you have made progress. Every mistake, every victory, and every confusing moment can lead you forth and can be something to celebrate.

Trainer Tip: When have you responded in a way you didn’t want? How could you have handled that situation differently? What would have better met your needs? Try not to judge your behavior, but learn from it. Each time we review our actions, we can learn something, become more adept at new skills, and come closer to our ideal. We can do this with the learning curve of practicing translating people’s words into feelings and needs.

Trainer Tip: When we have no hope of a conversation working out, our attitude towards the situation can contribute to our lack of success. Instead, start conversations that might be challenging with the intention of success. This can shift the energy immediately toward it. This doesn’t guarantee success, but can increase its chances.

• Cultivate thriving interpersonal relationships
• Discover paths to move beyond anger, blame, and judgment
• Connect with the Divine essence in other people
• Experience greater ease and joy in all your interactions

• Explore the complexities of how we can care for all of life using NVC
• See the role that power plays in relation to observations, feelings, needs, and requests
• Learn how to support people from many backgrounds in being able to apply NVC 
• Discern how to engage with these vast topics as we learn and share NVC

Trainer Tip: Sometimes the expression of our needs can sound like demands or criticism. This can make it harder for people to want to contribute to us. Today, pay attention to how you express your needs. Find ways to release the emotional charge.

Trainer Tip: It can help us bring joy into our lives to connect to the needs we serve for doing things. While our activities may not always be fun, understanding their purpose and their value to our lives can help us shift the energy behind the action and have a more positive experience. Consider the underlying needs activities meet, and decide if they are worth it to you.

Trainer Tip: When there is conflict, the chances are good that people are arguing over a particular strategy. When we focus on our needs, the opportunities for peaceful resolution that values everyone’s needs are much greater. This can also build trust. Be aware of opportunities to shift focus from strategies to needs. Read on for an example of how this can work.

Among NVC practitioners, empathy can be superficial. How open are you to being influenced by what others are saying? Do you reflect back and then guard and remain within your position of being right, even as you say otherwise? Only when we're eager to be influenced by what they say can we connect, expand our world and thus, shift the field. Without such openness we fool ourselves into thinking we are truly empathic listeners.

• Explore what makes the capacity lens radical and practical
• Understand the complexities of how capacity and willingness interface
• Mourn capacity limits within and around us without jumping to conclusions
• Orient to agreements as behavioral anchoring in support of your commitments

Trainer Tip: Do you sometimes feel lonely and disconnected from others? If so, look at how you may be participating in supporting that outcome and what you can do differently. For instance, if you want support or connection - but prioritize looking composed no matter how sad, hurt or angry you feel, you may shield yourself from authentically and vulnerably asking those things. Instead, make those requests.

So many of us have a habitual response of trying to eliminate uncertainty and the arrival of what we don't want. Alternatively, we can embrace the irreducible uncertainty of life. This shift from resistance and helplessness to mourning allows acceptance of outcomes, reduction of stress, and opens the door to noticing and appreciating what's present and available amidst challenges.

Have you ever had the experience of being truly heard and understood by another person? Or felt the astounding, breath-taking connection that arises when someone sheds all preconceived notions, gives you their full presence, and really sees you?

We call this The Amazing Power of Empathy – and the power does not stop there.

• Cultivate thriving interpersonal relationships
• Discover paths to move beyond anger, blame, and judgment
• Connect with the Divine essence in other people
• Experience greater ease and joy in all your interactions

• Gain a deeper insight into the spiritual practice of NVC as taught by Robert Gonzales
• Enhance your emotional intelligence and self-compassion
• Learn compassionate self-talk techniques and cultivate more inner peace
• Approach change with a peaceful mindset, rather than anxiety and fear

• Discover the healing magic that comes from welcoming pain rather than avoiding it
• Learn how to navigate ‘healing dialogues’ when hurt or pain is present
• Increase your empathy/honesty skills and your ability to navigate painful conversations
• Embrace pain as a precious life-guiding force that teaches us how to be together!

Anger and resentment can signal unmet needs. Through mourning those needs and practicing self-empathy, we may let go of blame, embrace reality, and reclaim responsibility for fulfilling our own needs. This process may lead to emotional transformation through conscious reflection, and a new outlook.

Often when someone else does something we don't like, it's easy to blame the other person. After all, we have all been trained to focus on fault when needs are not met. What can we do to shift that pattern?

Developing interpersonal relationship skills in congregations is integral to working with the conflicts that arise. These skills can be applied to any spiritual community.