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  1. However indirectly expressed, any judgement or criticism is about the person's own thoughts, feelings, needs, and requests.This awareness can help you take people's comments less personally, and give you options: silent self-empathy, standing in your truth, contact and curiosity, and honest expression.

  2. Speaking Classical Giraffe

    Speaking Classical Giraffe

    Jeff Brown

    Trainer Tips · 3 - 5 minutes · 7/28/2010

    Ask the Trainer: "At one point in my practice, it was brought to my attention that some people find the use of 'formal NVC' off-putting, or mechanical. Do you have any input or insight into this?"

  3. Positive Relationships in Parenting

    Positive Relationships in Parenting

    Roxy Manning

    Video · 7 minutes · 9/5/2024

    Roxy Manning emphasizes positive relationships in parenting, highlighting acceptance, understanding, and compromise. She stresses the importance of being aware of one's needs, attuning to the other person's needs, fostering trust, and encouraging open communication, especially with children. The approach involves a balance between meeting both sets of needs for a healthier dynamic.

  4. Making The Evolutionary Leap

    Making The Evolutionary Leap

    John Kinyon

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 2/1/2023

    Shared story has been a way for groups to unite in opposition to a common enemy. But more divergent and virulent beliefs/stories swirl through the internet and social media, facilitating people to polarize against one another. So notice when you're caught in a polarizing story; try shifting focus to observing your mind; somatic presence; underlying commonality; consciousness as universal need, energy, and spaciousness; and the natural compassion and generosity that flow from this.

  5. Taking the First Step

    Taking the First Step

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 8/1/2021

    Trainer Tip: If you're doing personal growth work, and changing your behaviors, you may find yourself wanting others to join your efforts with similar levels of enthusiasm. When they don't do so, you may feel frustrated and place judgments on them, thinking they aren't as caring. You'll be less likely to feel disappointed in people if you remind yourself that when you do personal growth work, what needs you are meeting for yourself.

  6. How to Use NVC with Talkative Friends

    How to Use NVC with Talkative Friends

    Liv Larsson

    Trainer Tips · 21 minutes · 7/28/2010

    Ask the Trainer: "Could you explore why people 'talk too much' and how I could connect with them and myself empathically when I'm also talking too much?"

  7. Finding Reasons to Celebrate

    Finding Reasons to Celebrate

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 9/23/2015

    Trainer Tip: Find ways to celebrate each day and enrich your life.

  8. Finding Ways to Meet Our Needs

    Finding Ways to Meet Our Needs

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 4/13/2016

    Trainer Tip: There are many ways to meet a need. Open to new possibilities.

  9. Being Persistent About Getting Our Needs Met

    Being Persistent About Getting Our Needs Met

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 3/6/2024

    Trainer Tip: When in a conflict that doesn’t seem to have a solution being aware of your needs, and then being creative and flexible about getting them met, can go a long way to coming up with creative solutions that work for everyone.

  10. Change Your Thoughts to Change Your World

    Change Your Thoughts to Change Your World

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 5/12/2021

    Trainer Tip: Changing your thoughts can change the way people experience you. Just for today, see if you can notice when you have judgmental thoughts about yourself or other people. Then look to translate those thoughts into your feelings and needs. Read on for an example of how this works.

  11. Sharing Power

    Sharing Power

    Jim & Jori Manske

    Audio · 39 minutes · 10/25/2011

    Jim and Jori discuss sharing power through exploring our experience of having and not having power, how we make choices about our power and examining our relationship to power itself.

    • Learn how to transform NVC into a tool for systemic awareness and healing
    • Examine the influence of difference, and uncover pathways that strengthen its capacity
    • Learn to receive and offer feedback on impact in situations fraught with power differences
    • Explore specific ways in which NVC systemically supports the full flowering of humanity
    • Delve into the dynamics of cultural differences, and discover how NVC can systemically contribute to a liberation perspective
  12. Empathic Connection and Politics

    Empathic Connection and Politics

    John Kinyon

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 10/27/2022

    How do we talk to ourselves and with others about polarizing topics in a way that's supportive? Seek to understand and be understood rather than press for agreement. Bring mindfulness into the conversation. Slow down and use structure to support everyone. Release knowing the solutions, answers or outcomes. Keep focus on shared universal needs. From this place we can say what's in our hearts and minds, and trust the process.

  13. Changing Our Habitual Approach to Change

    Changing Our Habitual Approach to Change

    Bob Wentworth

    Articles · 4 - 6 minutes · 7/4/2020

    Most of us subject ourselves to so many painful mental jabs and they seldom stimulate helpful change. We can be like a frustrated animal trainer repeatedly whipping an animal, without ever helping the animal to understand what behavior is wanted or offering encouragement. Instead, punishing thoughts can be stepping stones to awareness. We can focus on sensing what we're really aspiring to. This is more likely to eventually produce sustainable change that'll serve us better.

  14. The Art and Science of Happiness

    The Art and Science of Happiness

    (4 Session Course)

    Jim & Jori Manske

    Multi-session Course · 4 - 6 hours · 4/16/2018

    What is it that enables us to thrive? How can we influence our capacity to live a meaningful and fulfilling life? Join Jim and Jori Manske in this exciting telecourse recording on the intersection of NVC and cutting-edge Positive Psychology, the science of human thriving.

  15. Parenting With A Focus On The Long-Term Goal

    Parenting With A Focus On The Long-Term Goal

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 1/23/2023

    Trainer Tip: Notice when you're tempted to wield physical, emotional, and intellectual power to get your children to do what you want. This coercion or force may bring short term ease, but long term it can be counterproductive. Ask yourself “What do I want my child to do?” and “What do I want my child’s reasons for doing it to be?”. Then consider ways to help them connect to their intrinsic motivation for doing it.

  16. This chart is intended as an aid to translating words that are often confused with feelings. These words imply that someone is doing something to you and generally connote wrongness or blame. To use this list, when somebody says “I’m feeling rejected,” you might translate this as: “Are you feeling scared because you have a need for inclusion?”
  17. The Price of Nice

    The Price of Nice

    Kelly Bryson

    Articles · 12 - 16 minutes · 7/28/2010

    Have you been nice? Well then you must be enjoying the reward: depression, intermittent explosiveness, job meaninglessness, ambiguous anxiety, low resentment and subtle self hate. The antidotes: honesty, passion and compassion.

    • Discover how to be radically honest without pushing “the other” away
    • Learn to ask firmly and gracefully for what you want, hear ‘NO,’ and stay alive
    • Explore how the power of empathy dissolves anger, pain, and fear
    • Discern the essence of what others say, no matter how it is expressed
  18. I See the Spirit in You

    I See the Spirit in You

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 12/26/23

    Trainer Tip: We can voice our upset about a situation and still see the higher self in the other person. Honest expression can deepen connection and bring us closer to resolution and connection, when we're not judging them. To know that they're a spiritual being, but think they're an insensitive slob or egotistical bore, is a contradiction. Instead, look for the needs they want to meet. See the spiritual being in everyone—even yourself.

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