Image

Search the NVC Library

Search Results: needs

Advanced Search
  1. Defusing Anger

    Defusing Anger

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 1/25/2018

    Trainer Tip: Many of us are afraid of our anger because we haven’t learned how to express it in a way that brings relief or that helps us meet our needs in the situation. Consider a different approach to anger, one that helps you fully express your anger and is more likely to help you meet your needs for relief, to be heard, or to be understood.

  2. The Value of Change

    The Value of Change

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 12/29/2021

    Trainer Tip: Wanting collaboration? Show you value the other person's needs as much as your own. After you both feel heard, you can make joint decisions about specifics of the agreement, such as "division of work", "scope of project", "when the action will take place", "how it'll be done" and "timing of follow up to see how things went". Read on for an example of how this is applied to asking someone to pitch in with doing chores.

  3. Developing Discernment

    Developing Discernment

    Jim & Jori Manske

    Audio · 43 minutes · 10/25/2011

    Listen to Jim and Jori Manske share their understanding of discernment to gain clarity, insight, and wisdom for making life-serving distinctions and choices.

  4. Judging and Feeling Judged

    Judging and Feeling Judged

    Miki Kashtan

    Audio · 16 minutes · 7/28/2010

    In this potent audio, expert trainer Miki Kashtan demonstrates the eye-opening experience of translating judgments into needs. She works with a mother who is stuck in a loop of feeling judged by family members and judging them back.

  5. Living Abundantly

    Living Abundantly

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 12/7/2014

    Trainer Tip: Let's start an abundance movement! We get great joy from contributing to others lives and allowing them to contribute to ours, let's not let fear get in the way.

  6. There's No Such Thing as a Perfect Strategy

    There's No Such Thing as a Perfect Strategy

    Jim Manske

    Articles · 3 - 5 minutes · 12/2/2018

    In the face of needs that are still hungry to be satisfied, we can expand our view, plus generate ideas and creativity that can find new paths forward.  Try these tips to transform our complaint into commitment for a change in strategy that works with needs...

  7. Don't Take It Personally

    Don't Take It Personally

    Rachelle Lamb

    Articles · 10 - 15 minutes · 12/17/2018

    When we don't like what someone is saying to us, sometimes people encourage us to hear their needs, and "not take it personally" -- and we're inclined to agree.  Could "not taking it personally" close our hearts and awareness to others, life and ourselves?  Rachelle Lamb invites us to take a closer look at what it's like when we attend to the situation from our hearts, and skillfully reflect upon our actions with tenderness.

  8. Self-Empathy Basics

    Self-Empathy Basics

    Mary Mackenzie

    Video · 29 minutes · 07/29/2010

    Mary Mackenzie, an internationally renowned CNVC Certified Trainer, demonstrates two exercises that will help you learn fast “on the run” self-empathy techniques. The video includes practical techniques to guide you toward noticing your physical sensations, feelings and needs.

  9. In this recorded telecourse, John Kinyon, world renowned CNVC Certified Trainer, offers an overview and practice with four elements of empathy – presence, understanding/meaning, need language and deepening into needs.

  10. Creating More Efficient Meetings

    Creating More Efficient Meetings

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 8/22/2022

    Trainer Tip: Meetings can be unproductive when the participants aren’t clear about their needs or what they want from the group. When participants express opinions without expressing a need or informing the group of what they want, the meeting lacks clarity. Instead, if we can focus on naming our needs and make related requests, we can get closer to resolution much faster and enjoy the process more. Read on for an example.

  11. The Power of Empathy

    The Power of Empathy

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 5/26/2014

    Trainer Tip: When someone is in pain and lashing out, might be a time when empathy is needed most. Empathizing in these moments can be very challenging. Mary offers a few words of ecouragement for these situations.

  12. 3 Strategies for Working With Worry

    3 Strategies for Working With Worry

    Elia Lowe-Chardé

    Articles · 4 - 6 minutes · 2/5/2021

    Follow worry to the underlying universal need and discern wise action. To get there, we can try out prayer, wishes, savoring the need, or compassionate witnessing. If you notice and name the aspects of worry continuously, the compassionate witnessing practice will interrupt the habitual spinning of worry-filled stories. There are at least six things you can witness with curiosity. Read on for more.

  13. Identify 12 Essential Aspects of Empathy

    Identify 12 Essential Aspects of Empathy

    Elia Lowe-Chardé

    Practice Exercises · 2 - 3 minutes · 10/23/2023

    Empathy is a form of attunement. Empathy is giving your compassionate curiosity by guessing another’s feelings and needs. Consider how you live or relate to each of these 12 essential aspects of empathy. Some of them mention how we can offer empathy without abandoning ourselves, how empathy isn't always the best response, and how "Empathy can be offered when you disagree with another’s opinion, memory, or perspective."

  14. Making A Connection In A Difficult Situation

    Making A Connection In A Difficult Situation

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 7/17/2022

    Trainer Tip: Whether there is the potential of physical or emotional violence, listening deeply to the underlying needs of the people in conflict can be swift, direct, and healing. Look for opportunities to defuse conflicts by reflecting the feelings and needs of the other person.

  15. Getting Out of Ourselves

    Getting Out of Ourselves

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 4/29/2015

    Trainer Tip: NVC asks us to be aware of our needs and discomfort is evidence of an unment need. However focusing on ourselves when we're uncomfortable isn't always the best choice.

  16. The Big Why

    The Big Why

    Alan Rafael Seid

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 7/14/2022

    Some questions will take you deeper and deeper to universal human needs when you toggle between them. Questions like “What do I need?”, “If I had that, then what would I have?”, and “If I had that, what would that give me?”

  17. How to present "harm being done" in an NVC way

    How to present "harm being done" in an NVC way

    Roxy Manning

    Video · 1 minute 19 second · 01/28/2023

    Certified CNVC trainer Roxy Manning, Phd, answers a question: how do we use the term "harm" in NVC? Think of the word "harm" as an unmet need, practice observation to identify the need or needs that are not met.

  18. Can We Un-Skew Resource Distribution?

    Can We Un-Skew Resource Distribution?

    Miki Kashtan

    Articles · 14 - 21 minutes · 4/8/2019

    In learning how to re-invent the economic system so that it distributes resources in a way that includes as many people's needs as possible, we would need to be in a process of mutual influence with one another. However, addressing resource distribution can be complex when people in different social locations have 1.)a different sense of what's considered "enough" 2.) different capacities to find creative strategies that work within the given limitations, and 3.)different levels of self-doubt, shame and capacity to put their concerns and needs on the table. Can we collectively create conditions that support people to stretch productively so that included in the outcome are the needs, perspectives, ideas, and concerns of people who are less powerful? What needs to be in place to support the way towards a better future?

  19. Expressing Anger Peacefully

    Expressing Anger Peacefully

    Raj Gill

    Audio · 1 hour, 16 minutes · 7/29/2010

    In this prerecorded telecourse, Raj Gil uses an interactive dialogue and proven exercises to help you develop a profoundly healthy response to anger, right in the moment.

  20. Focusing on Where We Are the Same

    Focusing on Where We Are the Same

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 12/2/2021

    Trainer Tip: Our differences are not in our needs, but in how we attempt to meet them. This simple truth can help you lessen the conflicts in your life and your judgments of other people. Rather than focus on where you disagree, focus on where you are the same. This shift can make a profound difference in your ability to understand yourself and other people, and to bring unity to your life.

NVCAcademy Logo

Subscription Preferences

Stay In Touch!

Looking for ways to keep up with NVC Academy news, get special offers, free resources, or words of inspiration? Here are five ways to stay engaged: