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  1. Defining Needs

    Defining Needs

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 2/20/2021

    In NVC we define needs as resources that life requires to sustain itself. All human beings have the same needs. The strategy is what we do to meet that need. Strategies are specific; we all choose unique ways to meet our needs. The more we can see the difference between the two, the more likely we are to resolve conflicts with ease. Today, look for opportunities to notice the difference in the given situation.

  2. Becoming a Change Agent Everywhere You Go

    Becoming a Change Agent Everywhere You Go

    (4 Session Course)

    Miki Kashtan

    Multi-session Course · 6 - 8 hours · 10/27/2019

    Do you sometimes feel overwhelmed – or locked into passivity? This course offers you a way out. Learn to change the way you perceive leadership, and you’ll help yourself respond more powerfully and proactively every day of your life – wherever you are – and whomever you’re with!

  3. Reaching Critical Mass

    Reaching Critical Mass

    John Kinyon

    Trainer Tips · 2 - 3 minutes · 6/1/2023

    We only have this decade to make radical changes to avert crossing over into an unlivable Earth. What's essential is a critical mass of people with capacity to respond to many enormous, daunting social-environmental challenges. This means on a wider scale, responding to conflict, fear, hate, injustice and violence with the ability to see our commonality underlying our differences. And to feel part of a larger whole so we can birth natural caring, togetherness, and cooperation.

  4. Transforming Painful Patterns

    Transforming Painful Patterns

    Arnina Kashtan

    Practice Exercises · 7 pages · 7/29/2010

    Why is it so difficult to change our patterns even when we want to, even when we experience shame or despair about them? Arnina Kashtan offers some of the common pitfalls and concrete steps to overcome them in the future.

  5. Breaking Barriers:

    Breaking Barriers:

    Roxy Manning

    Live Zoom Course · ·

    • Explore how gender power dynamics impact everyday interactions
    • Learn how to navigate these complexities with curiosity and compassion
    • Gain the skills to build inclusive personal and professional environments
    • Contribute to a world where every voice matters!
  6. Clarifying Our Requests to Meet Our Needs

    Clarifying Our Requests to Meet Our Needs

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 8/9/2014

    Trainer Tip: Clarifying our requests can make the difference between frustration and satisfaction, Mary shows you how.

  7. Second Chances

    Second Chances

    Eric Bowers

    Trainer Tips · 1-2 minutes · 1/13/2014

    Trainer Tip: Persistence is key in NVC. A small shift in approach can make a big difference.

  8.  beginnerspathway stamp blue
    • Learn how to apply NVC to real-life situations
    • Discover how to prevent and resolve misunderstandings and conflicts
    • Speak your truth in a way that creates more harmony
    • Witness how NVC can be adapted for interpersonal success!
    • Understand the dynamics of power struggles
    • Explore practical strategies for navigating power imbalances
    • Discover ways you can share power in various relationships
    • Explore how NVC supports a move away from domination, into shared power
  9. The Key to Getting Your Needs Met

    The Key to Getting Your Needs Met

    Alan Rafael Seid

    Articles · 5 - 7 minutes · 09/01/2025

    Clear, actionable requests are vital for fulfilling needs and maintaining relationships. In NVC, a true request differs from a demand by honoring both parties’ needs equally. Effective requests are specific, present, positive, and doable, and using them strengthens connection, prevents resentment, and promotes mutual understanding. Here are three key skills to making effective requests and three types of requests.

  10. I have choice…

    I have choice…

    Mary Mackenzie

    Peaceful Living Blog · ·

    That is my mantra this year. It came to me when I was headed somewhere to do something that I had wanted to do, and yet I was feeling annoyed about it because traffic was heavy and overwhelming. I then gave myself a few moments of self-empathy where I connected to the deeper needs that were propelling me to do the thing in the first place. In an instant, my annoyance and looming resentment slipped away and I felt happy and relaxed.
    • Explore what makes the capacity lens radical and practical
    • Understand the complexities of how capacity and willingness interface
    • Mourn capacity limits within and around us without jumping to conclusions
    • Orient to agreements as behavioral anchoring in support of your commitments
  11. How Anger Can Help or Hinder

    How Anger Can Help or Hinder

    Elia Lowe-Chardé

    Practice Exercises · 2 - 3 minutes · 9/25/2023

    We can use anger as an important signal to let us know that we perceive a threat to a universal need or value, directing our attention to something so that we can take effective action, and avoid harmful thought patterns. For example, instead of dwelling on a "should," focus on addressing unmet needs through boundaries and effective communication.

  12. Making Requests to Enrich Our Lives

    Making Requests to Enrich Our Lives

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 11/17/2022

    Trainer Tip: When you make a request of someone, you don't diminish your relationship; you enhance it. If you receive a "no" to your request, consider brainstorming a different strategy that would meet your needs. It isn’t a sign of weakness to clarify what you would like. It helps you commit to living a full and joyful life. Look for opportunities to clarify your requests.

  13. Stimulus vs. Cause

    Stimulus vs. Cause

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 6/22/2020

    Trainer tip: Notice how the exact same actions can stimulate different feelings depending on if your needs are met or unmet. So while what people say or do is the stimulus, the actual cause of our feelings comes from our met or unmet needs. Read on for more on this.

  14. How to Ask for Space

    How to Ask for Space

    Elia Lowe-Chardé

    Practice Exercises · 2-3 minutes · 06/15/2025

    In relationships, the desire for space can conflict with the need for intimacy. This conflict arises from different strategies to meet similar needs. By identifying specific needs behind the request for space and understanding the other person’s needs for closeness, both of you can negotiate and collaborate. Repeated conflicts may indicate the need for personal healing, which you’ll need to address individually.

  15. Whether its pandemics, climate change, damage to the environment or other massive challenges that humanity faces, what are we to do if we can't agree on even the most basic information and knowledge? From empathic understanding we can focus on shared, universal human needs (where there is no conflict or disagreement) underlying our perceptions, and feelings. Then we can see if there are ways we can agree on to meet those needs.

  16. What are the most powerful things I can do to build an inspired relationship? I answered the question with romantic relationships in mind; however, I believe the answer below applies to all important relationships.

  17. Greetings dear readers of the Growing Roots Newsletter! Mary Mackenzie invited me to be a guest writer for this issue to which I happily agreed. She also shared that her messages are typically more personal in nature, something I always appreciate in a newsletter. The challenge for me then is to...
  18. Enemy Images Process and Exercise

    Enemy Images Process and Exercise

    Jeff Brown

    Practice Exercises · N/A · 7/28/2010

    Ask the Trainer: Get guidance on working with enemy images and exercises that bring relief.

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