Image

Search the NVC Library

Search Results: ally

Advanced Search
  1. Inspired by Marshall Rosenberg's teachings, Kathleen Macferran's self-empathy exercise offers a transformative approach for those challenging moments when you fall short of your own expectations.

  2. Join Dian Killian as she reframes the 4 steps of NVC (observations, feelings, needs, requests) into everyday words you might hear at work.

  3. NVC Zen

    NVC Zen

    Aya Caspi

    Video · 8.5 minutes · 09/21/2022

    We each have the power to be the creator of our own inner experience, no matter what is going on externally. The moment you imply wrongness on others, you give power to them. In this excerpt, Aya Caspi shows that the more self-responsibility you take, the more freedom you will have.  

  4. Join Dian Killian as she reframes the 4 steps of NVC (observations, feelings, needs, requests) into everyday words you might hear at work.

  5. Cause of Feelings

    Cause of Feelings

    Sylvia Haskvitz

    Audio · 13 minutes · 7/29/2010

    Many of us blame other people for our feelings but our own state of needs is the true cause. In this powerful audio, Sylvia teaches you how to manage your emotions in challenging situations and demonstrates the process of Screaming in Giraffe.

  6. The Four Responses Exercise Cards

    The Four Responses Exercise Cards

    Rachelle Lamb

    Learning Tools · 30 - 60 minutes · 05/20/2019

    Use these cards in your practice group or NVC training to understand 4 different ways of responding to hard to hear messages. Become aware of the way you habitually respond to stimulus and develop skills to respond with empathy and express honestly.

  7. Equanimity and the Holidays

    Equanimity and the Holidays

    Elia Lowe-Chardé

    Articles · 2 - 3 minutes · 12/2/2019

    If you're unpleasantly triggered during the holidays you may find yourself responding in ways you don't like. Start by acknowledging how affected you are to bring in more curiosity, mindfulness and eventually, authentic and discerning choices.

  8. Responding to Unwanted Feedback from Peers

    Responding to Unwanted Feedback from Peers

    Elia Lowe-Chardé

    Articles · 6 - 9 minutes · 11/25/2020

    When someone offers continual unsoliticed feedback or advice, setting a boundary may not be easy if you care about how they might hear you. And if you don't set a boundary, you may eventually become resentful and say something you regret. Instead, here are six ways to respond, with varying degrees of effectiveness.

  9. I Want to Leave When Facing Anger

    I Want to Leave When Facing Anger

    Arnina Kashtan

    Video · 4 minutes · 12/12/2021

    Receiving anger from another can be a reactive trigger for many of us. In this brief segment, Arnina provides us a strategy for staying in the conversation instead of physically leaving.

  10. This chart is intended as an aid to translating words that are often confused with feelings. These words imply that someone is doing something to you and generally connote wrongness or blame. To use this list, when somebody says “I’m feeling rejected,” you might translate this as: “Are you feeling scared because you have a need for inclusion?”
  11. The Art and Science of Happiness

    The Art and Science of Happiness

    (4 Session Course)

    Jim & Jori Manske

    Multi-session Course · 4 - 6 hours · 4/16/2018

    What is it that enables us to thrive? How can we influence our capacity to live a meaningful and fulfilling life? Join Jim and Jori Manske in this exciting telecourse recording on the intersection of NVC and cutting-edge Positive Psychology, the science of human thriving.

  12. Join Susan Skye as she guides you to experience profound transformation of the inner jackal messages resulting from childhood trauma. Discover how the limbic system of the brain works, and transform jackal messages stored there with compassionate connection.

  13. Connecting When Worldviews Conflict

    Connecting When Worldviews Conflict

    (4 Session Course)

    John Kinyon, Matthew Rich

    Multi-session Course · 6 hours · 3/17/2019

    John Kinyon and Matthew Rich examine the ways in which people’s worldviews can be different and why this often creates conflict.

  14. We can't alone (nor with lone communities) transform the hidden structures of violence and domination. Dialogue alone isn't disruptive enough. We can easily be in dialogue with Trump supporters while the planet burns up, millions are still hungry, and we go extinct. NVC seriously risks reinforcing vast inequities and abuses if we're not radically engaging systemic constraints, and impacts of our choices that go beyond our immediate circle. Read on for ways to leverage NVC practices to expand true social change.

  15. A Talk About Needs

    A Talk About Needs

    Mary Mackenzie

    Audio · 10 minutes · 7/29/2010

    Listen to this audio to learn the value of focusing on needs in an NVC model, either for the first time or as a refresher course. Living from a needs-consciousness creates abundance, clarity and choice. Using three examples from participants, Mary guides the group towards identifying and then connecting with the needs of both parties involved in each situation. It becomes clear very quickly that people choose different ways to support their needs; and many times they have the same needs in a given situation. When we understand this, we are able to create peace in our relationships and negotiations.

    “Everything someone does or says is an attempt to meet a need,” says CNVC Certified Trainer Mary Mackenzie. This simple statement is a foundational understanding in Nonviolent Communication; once you gain skills at living in a “needs-consciousness” you will literally change your life and your perception of the world, and improve all of your relationships.

  16. Love as a Need

    Love as a Need

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 8/14/2017

    Trainer Tip: In Nonviolent Communication, we consider love to be a need. Remember that needs are universal; everyone has the same ones. We all need love, but the ways in which we express it can be very different.

  17. How To Know If Someone Has Been Heard

    How To Know If Someone Has Been Heard

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 6/11/2022

    Trainer Tip: People tend to look, act, and sound softer when they have been more fully heard. If you're unsure whether someone has been heard and you want to be cautious, you may ask them, “Is there anything else you’d like me to hear?”. If you try to reason with or educate them before they're heard, they'll likely respond negatively. After they're heard, you may notice a willingness on their part to listen and proceed.

  18. Faux Feelings (Judgements) Handouts and Cards

    Faux Feelings (Judgements) Handouts and Cards

    Katrina Vaillancourt

    Learning Tools · 5 - 7 minutes · 12/1/2024

    We typically think of certain words as feelings when they can be judgements (eg. “abandoned”). Hidden within evaluative/judgement words are true feelings and needs (eg. if we think we’re abandoned we may feel lonely or hurt, and want togetherness or belonging). With this handout discover more hidden feelings and needs within the judgements that sound like feelings. Then download the card deck to further practice and learn.
    • Learn how to set up and maintain effective systems
    • Acquire tips for harnessing community buy-in and the energies of key people
    • Transform tension and anxiety into peaceful, life-enriching energy
    • Remain grounded and confident when facing any kind of conflict
  19. Privacy vs. Secrecy & Boundaries

    Privacy vs. Secrecy & Boundaries

    Elia Lowe-Chardé

    Articles · 3 - 5 minutes · 6/1/2019

    What's the real reason you choose to talk about something or not? "Privacy" can become a misplaced label that's used to hide harmful behaviour. Secrets typically come from reactivity -- and can carry shame, fear or threat of harm, and take a toll. And yet, if something private gets mislabeled as a "secret" it can also trigger shame and fear. The key to all this may be in relating to privacy from a place of clear differentiation, boundaries, agency, care and discernment.

NVCAcademy Logo

Subscription Preferences

Stay In Touch!

Looking for ways to keep up with NVC Academy news, get special offers, free resources, or words of inspiration? Here are five ways to stay engaged: