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  1. Observation is the awareness of our sensory perceptions and thoughts, separate from evaluations and judgments. Feeling involves bodily sensations and emotions, distinct from "faux feelings" that mix thought and emotion. Needs encompass universal human requirements for survival and wellness, while thoughts and evaluations express needs. Requests are rooted in connection and invite true willingness, rather than demanding compliance.

  2. It may be challenging to hear or make requests when you feel shame regarding anyone's feelings and needs. Without support, shame could be debilitating, so you may feel resistant and become defensive, hear threat, or criticize others. Instead, be with people who allow space for vulnerability. Find ways to celebrate, negotiate, be mindful, accepting, and creative.

  3. The human species is trained and habituated towards separation. This model encourages humans to either give up on their needs or fight for their needs. In this short video, Miki shares how increasing capacity shifts habits of separation and supports holding of all needs. Through intensive lifelong practices we learn to increase our capacity to receive and to increase our capacity to be generous supports our overall capacity to hold all needs.

  4. This chart is intended as an aid to translating words that are often confused with feelings. These words imply that someone is doing something to you and generally connote wrongness or blame. To use this list, when somebody says “I’m feeling rejected,” you might translate this as: “Are you feeling scared because you have a need for inclusion?”
  5. What Could I Say or Do When Someone Does Not Talk?

    What Could I Say or Do When Someone Does Not Talk?

    Jim & Jori Manske

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 7/28/2010

    Can you give me advice on what to do when people won't talk to me? I find it very difficult to discover what their needs are that aren't being met! Also, how can I be effective with people who don't actually want to think about why they're being the way they are?

  6. The Sweetest Game in Town

    The Sweetest Game in Town

    Contributing Without Praise

    Inbal Kashtan

    Trainer Tips · 2 - 3 minutes · 7/28/2010

    Inbal answers a parent's question about praise and offers a perspective on how praise translates into the NVC framework.

  7. Taking Responsibility for Your Choices

    Taking Responsibility for Your Choices

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 5/10/2014

    Trainer Tip: Giving up on blame and taking responsibilty for our choices is immensely empowering. Mary offers a tip for growing in this direction.

  8. I am not an angry person…

    I am not an angry person…

    Mary Mackenzie

    Peaceful Living Blog · ·

    Recently, I have been pondering anger, how I express it and the jackal story I tell myself about it. Marshall Rosenberg taught that anger is a natural emotion that is based on a judgment of someone else or myself. I agree with this, so I have been doing some “enemy images” and self-empathy work (and praying for those who are most likely to be the recipients of my anger). My goal was to clear my judgments and take responsibility for my “stuff.” It has helped a lot, and yet I still feel a general anger in me that is not directly related to anyone or any specific situation.
  9. Join Eric, as he reveals a clear path from heartbreaking intimate relationships to joyful, thriving intimate relationships. Eric uses his passion for helping singles heal from their past relationships, to help you to experience more ease, joy and mutuality in future relationships.

  10. Inspired By Meeting A Greek God

    Inspired By Meeting A Greek God

    Robert Maoz Krzisnik

    Articles · 4 - 6 minutes · 7/19/2023

    This anecdote illustrates how a young man had the social awareness to consider how male conditioning may bring up competitiveness in his interactions with another man. The young man offered transparency and checked for consent in a way that shows an embodiment of power-with, togetherness, consideration, care, collaboration... and all without displaying any formal NVC training, and without looking to impress.

  11. Join Aya Caspi, a Certified NVC Trainer, as she delves into the difficult topic of parenting, childhood trauma, and social status. She discusses the generational impact of being labeled by society as "less than" or subservient. The wounds of childhood trauma can be healed so they no longer are a means of control by a dominant culture.

  12. Creating the Life You Want With Powerful Requests

    Creating the Life You Want With Powerful Requests

    (5 Session Course)

    Miki Kashtan

    Multi-session Course · 5 hours, 11 minutes · 8/7/2017

    In this telecourse recording, expert trainer Miki Kashtan will help you uncover what prevents you from making requests for everything you want without fear. The class includes daily practices for requests skill building.

  13. Less than 2 weeks ago from the time I’m writing this letter, Hamas militants crossed from Gaza into Israel and killed more than 1,300 people, most of them civilians. Israel then retaliated and killed over 3,000 Gazans, most of them civilians. The death rate continues to increase every day.  
  14. Making Sure We Are Heard

    Making Sure We Are Heard

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 6/16/2019

    Trainer Tip: We all see through our own filters. To disentangle what we hear from some is really saying, check using understanding requests at the level of detail you need. Course correct along the way. In a charged situation this can be critical to bringing in clarity, being heard and resolving differences amicably.

  15. Find Space Between Needs And Strategies

    Find Space Between Needs And Strategies

    LaShelle Lowe-Chardé

    Practice Exercises · 4 - 6 minutes · 1/26/2023

    Confidence, flexibility, creativity and equanimity may become more possible when you would like someone to meet a particular need, can trust that you can meet that need with someone else, and can accept a “no” to your requests. You can allow grief or disappointment to arise, and naturally turn towards a relationship in which those needs can be met. In some cases this may lead to the dissolution of a partnership or friendship.

  16. Acknowledging Our Inner Critic

    Acknowledging Our Inner Critic

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 9/21/2019

    Trainer Tip: Our inner critic judges ourselves and other people; and it is the most likely to get scared when we begin to make a change. It holds wisdom for us if we are willing to listen. When we acknowledge our inner critic and empathize with its need, we gain insights into ourselves and we clear the way for resolution.

  17. Leadership Within Your Workplace

    Leadership Within Your Workplace

    (4 Session Course)

    Miki Kashtan

    Multi-session Course · 4 - 6 hours · 10/27/2019

    Most of us believe we are powerless at work – even if we’re the one “in charge.” This course offers you the opportunity to learn how to consciously change this mindset, and have a positive impact on workplace culture and attitudes along the way. Most of us believe we are powerless at work – even if we’re the one “in charge.” This course offers you the opportunity to learn how to consciously change this mindset, and have a positive impact on workplace culture and attitudes along the way.

  18. How I Continue to Mess Up Being an Ally

    How I Continue to Mess Up Being an Ally

    Oren Jay Sofer

    Articles · 5 - 8 minutes · 7/25/2020

    Working for racial justice is a shift in perspective—a shift in understanding and empathy that leads to a change in our actions: to listen instead of talk, to follow instead of lead, to yield rather than dominate. And to accept that I will continue to mess up. Part of working to undo racism is having the humility to know when our own understanding is limited. Read on for more this, and how it relates to meditation -- plus personal and collective liberation.

  19. Acknowledging Other People’s Reality

    Acknowledging Other People’s Reality

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 7/23/2021

    Trainer Tip: Even if we don't agree, acknowledging others' realities can help demonstrate that we're including their feelings and needs in the conversation. Creating space for your reality and theirs can also bring a sense of connection, understanding, inclusion, abundance and fullness in life. Try it today. Read on for an example.

  20. Restoring Togetherness

    Restoring Togetherness

    Miki Kashtan

    Live Zoom Course · ·

    • Support family, community, and organizations to realign with life
    • Get the building blocks of integrative decisions that work for all
    • Learn to lean on all available capacities to dance together for liberation
    • Reweave the threads of togetherness into something stronger than individual existence