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What is Nonviolent Communication?

Trainer Tip I saw my Lord with the eye of my heart, and I said: Who art Thou? He said: Thou. —Al-Hallaj "Nonviolent Communication (sometimes known as Compassionate Communication) is a way of interacting that facilitates the flow of communication needed to resolve differences peacefully. It focuses on shared human values and needs, and encourages the use of language that increases good will, and...
Observation, the First Component of Nonviolent Communication

Trainer Tip He that knows least commonly presumes the most. —Thomas Fuller, M.D. Your five-year-old just drew on your wall with crayons and you think, “He’s trying to make my life difficult because he’s mad at me.” Or your husband comes home later than he had agreed to for the third time this week, so you think, “He doesn’t care about my feelings at all.” Sound familiar? People often decide why...
Distinguishing Freedom from Submission / Rebellion

In this excerpt from their book, CHOICE: A field guide for navigating the polarization of our world and living interdependently, Kathleen and Jared offer a path to reach deeper clarity, distinguishing between freedom from submission and rebellion. Freedom Choice between stimulus and response I am aware of my personal power to decide how I respond in any situation. I lean into my own authority...
Communicating With People Who Don’t Share Our Values

Trainer Tip Courage is the price that life exacts for granting peace. —Amelia Earhart Nonviolent Communication works with everyone, even people who aren’t familiar with the process or don’t share our values for connection and compassion. In fact, compassion automatically blossoms when we stay true to the principles of Nonviolent Communication. We don’t try to convince anyone to do it our way or...
Inspired By Meeting A Greek God

Sometimes life provides inspiring moments that are better than what I could come up with in my fantasy. For example, several years ago I landed, together with my then-wife on Crete, to start our one-week vacation. As it had been agreed beforehand, there was somebody waiting for us in the arrival hall, with our names on a piece of paper, to hand us the car we rented for that week. And, it was...
The Relief of Authenticity

Trainer Tip The most exhausting thing in life is being insincere. —Anne Morrow Lindbergh Sometimes I hear people say that they don’t have the energy to be authentic, and that it is easier to ignore their truth to keep the peace. I understand this sentiment because I lived this way for many years. I thought it took less energy to censor myself, to go along with what other people wanted, and even...
Navigating Uncertainty

In uncertain times, when facing important life decisions, it's common to get caught up in imagining various scenarios and potential outcomes. The desire to predict and control the future often gives a false sense of security. The key is to make decisions based on the information available now, minimizing the number of irreversible choices. This approach maintains focus on what is known and...
Uncertainty, Human Limitations, and Acceptance

I know I am done working my way through something when I get to a place of feeling grateful for it. That’s when I know that I have assimilated the events, and am open to life again. Sometimes it takes years (some things I may not finish while alive, I am quite sure of that), and sometimes it takes only moments. This morning I went from acute helplessness to gratitude in less than an hour, and I...
Set Your Intentions with Attention

Access this complete 3 session course At the end of the calendar year, many of us feel an old pressure to come up with New Year's resolutions This may be followed by internal demands along with our inevitable and life-alienating reactions to those demands. Sound familiar? Are you looking for something different? If your answer is yes, then join Kristin Masters for a delightful 3-session journey...
Embracing the Body

Access this complete 6 session course When Dian works with managers, they often ask how they can manage others more effectively. She almost always asks them: how are you managing yourself? This question applies to all aspects of life, both at work and at home. How are you: 1) gaining clarity around your needs; 2) managing your internal reactions; and 3) clarifying your requests before you open...