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  1. In this book excerpt, Kathleen and Jared offer a path to reach deeper clarity, distinguishing between freedom and submission / rebellion.

  2. How Submission and Rebellion Erode Goodwill

    How Submission and Rebellion Erode Goodwill

    Rachelle Lamb

    Video · 5:18 minutes · 02/03/2024

    When you say yes, check if you are saying it out of submission. Similarly, when you say no, are you saying it genuinely or out of rebellion? Marshall Rosenberg calls this a loss or erosion of goodwill which can destroy or undermine relationships. In this video, Rachelle Lamb shares how submission and rebellion in communication can diminish your power.

  3. The Vortex of Submission

    The Vortex of Submission

    (9 Session Course)

    Jim & Jori Manske

    Multi-session Course · 9 hours, 55 minutes · 6/23/2017

    Join CNVC Certified Trainers Jori and Jim Manske in an exploration of how gratitude can enable you to remain more present moment to moment, thus enabling you to flourish in your life!

  4. Choice vs. Submission Or Rebellion

    Choice vs. Submission Or Rebellion

    Eddie Zacapa

    Trainer Tips · 1 -2 minutes · 3/20/2022

    When an entity or system has authority or power and mandates something we don't agree with we may submit or to rebel. If we submit, we give in or give up, often out of fear. If we rebel, we're in reactivity which may not help our cause, and reduce our power. This may result in others' resentment, anger, and pain. Gandhi and Martin Luther King didn't submit nor rebel. Instead, they were in choice and advocated for their cause.

  5. Motivation Through Joy

    Motivation Through Joy

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 7/19/2021

    Pay attention to when you're motivated by guilt, duty, obligation, shame, and worry. How do you feel? Does it bring up resentment, rebellion, submission, reactivity or resistance? When you're motivated by joy notice how that feels, and how others respond. Read on for a related story.

  6. What will it take to reclaim our fundamental relatedness with all things alive, surrender our attempts to control nature, and find a way of living that averts or mitigates the worst possible catastrophes awaiting us while it's still possible?

  7. Social Dynamics During the Holidays

    Social Dynamics During the Holidays

    Jori Manske

    Trainer Tips · 2 - 3 minutes · 12/4/2019

    During the holiday season we may find ourselves taking responsibility for other's feelings, which can lead to guilt, shame, depression, and resentment. These feelings are exacerbated by the habitual pattern we call the "Vortex of Submission" (being hooked by a sense of duty and obligation). Read on for ways to recognize and break the pattern.

  8. The Unconquerable Virus Of Cult

    The Unconquerable Virus Of Cult

    Robert Maoz Krzisnik

    Articles · 8 - 12 minutes · 02/16/2024

    Even groups and organizations with noblest visions can slide into cult-like swamps. The reasons that bring people together are irrelevant; whether it's politics, spirituality, activism, art… a hidden hierarchy, plus dominance and submission dynamic can sprout, and beliefs that “we, our leader, and our path is better than others, we have all the answers”. As a member it can be hard to see. Here are signs of cult mentality and ways to assess.

  9. Liberating Ourselves from Our “Shoulds”

    Liberating Ourselves from Our “Shoulds”

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 5/2/2020

    Trainer tip: When you tell yourself that you have to do something, you're more likely to disconnect yourself from the needs you’re trying to meet, and also diminish the joy in your life. Instead, experiment with translating your “shoulds” and “have tos” into the need you are trying to meet.

  10. Unpacking OFNR - Requests

    Unpacking OFNR - Requests

    Roxy Manning

    Articles · 5 - 8 minutes · 5/6/2021

    Many believe it's only a true NVC request when we can ask for what we need without urgency or insistence. But what if we're the target of oppression and hate in a world with systemic inequality? Is it still nonviolence to abdicate power by allowing the person enacting harm to be the one to decide whether harm continues? The intensity of the need, degree of harm, and how chronically unmet the need is, are factors to guide us for when to apply force and demand within NVC. We can be attached to outcome, without being attached to strategy.

  11. Protective Vs. Punitive Use Of Force

    Protective Vs. Punitive Use Of Force

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 1/14/2023

    Trainer Tip: Punitive use of force stems from a belief that people behave in certain ways because they're bad, and that they need to be punished to mend their ways. One way to punish is to judge them. In contrast, protective use of force stems from a desire to prevent injury or injustice. It focuses on protecting people’s rights and well-being, not judging their behavior.

  12. Exercise For Saying "No" And Staying Connected

    Exercise For Saying "No" And Staying Connected

    Jim & Jori Manske

    Practice Exercises · 1 - 2 minutes · 1/28/2022

    Ever have a hard time saying "no" to someone, or feel obligated to say yes? Here's an exercise that can help you notice where you are placing yourself as someone who "has to" say yes; the needs in the other person making the request; what you want to say "yes" to (regarding your needs and theirs) by saying "no"; what prevents you from saying "yes"; plus your request and how you might express it.

  13. Working With Others' Mixed “Yes”

    Working With Others' Mixed “Yes”

    Inbal Kashtan, Miki Kashtan

    Practice Exercises · 1 - 3 minutes · 5/21/2024

    In this exercise choose a situation in which you got a “yes” to your request but you are not confident that it was agreed to freely or joyfully. Then explore your response to their “yes”, and possible unexpressed "no", with related observations, judgements, feelings, needs, requests, and alternate strategies that come up.

  14. Changing A One-Way Caretaking Relationship

    Changing A One-Way Caretaking Relationship

    Elia Lowe-Chardé

    Practice Exercises · 5 - 8 minutes · 10/24/2022

    Notice situations where you're attending to another and giving up on your needs with resentment or a sense of submitting. You can also watch for “shoulds,” obligation, and black-and-white thinking around the support you offer. Is there a sense that if you don't carry out a particular action something bad will happen? If so, identify the needs at hand and brainstorm a variety of strategies to meet them.

  15. Boundaries

    Boundaries

    The Journey To Being Able To Say "No"

    Elia Lowe-Chardé

    Articles · 5 - 8 minutes · 11/5/2022

    Struggling to say "no"? Here are ways you change your adjacent mind patterns. First, note the differences between those who respect boundaries and those who often don't. Second, review situations in which you lost track of your choice. And rehearse what it would sound, look, and feel like if you kept connection to your choice. Third, seek validation of your experience - from a grounded and mindful (non-reactive) state.

  16. Why Patriarchy Is Not about Men

    Why Patriarchy Is Not about Men

    Miki Kashtan

    Articles · 11 - 16 minutes · 2/21/2024

    Read here about patriarchy as a system, its impact on men and women, how its rooted in separation and control, leading to dominance and submission. Under patriarchy, even men are brutalized. Instead, we can embrace nonviolence to challenge patriarchy and its offspring (eg. capitalism, child trafficking, etc). And to make a lifelong commitment to undo socialization, act within our influence, and work towards liberation of all.

  17. Getting Started

    Melissa .

    Author Support · ·

  18. Ready to submit your work?

    Melissa .

    Author Support · ·

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