
Search Results: asking
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Let's look at the resources, awareness, and skills needed to ask for emotional attunement, celebration, relatedness, perspective, understanding, advice, and information. This includes expressing appreciation for what's supporting your needs, strengthening a sense of worthiness, and awareness of your reactivity and intention. Plus, making requests that are clear, specific, doable and creates a heart connection with others.
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There are various ways to be known. Learn how to engage and make clear requests accordingly. This includes getting clear in yourself about what exactly you want known; communicating how important it is to you; sharing examples in your life of being known; requesting and negotiating from the energy of the met need; letting the other person know whether or not the relationship is really sustainable for you if the need goes unmet long-term; and checking the other person's capacity.
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Join CNVC Certified Trainers Jeff Brown, Jean Morrison, Karl Steyaert, Kathleen Macferran, Mary Mackenzie and Sylvia Haskvitz in a lively Q&A session focusing on naturalizing NVC into our daily interactions.
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Trainer Tip: Could you tell me something I do that meets your need for love?
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In this audio recording, Veteran CNVC Certified Trainer, Sylvia Haskvitz uses real-life situations to help us find more natural expressions of what is harmony with our hearts.
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Sylvia Haskvitz uses 20+ years of experience to introduce the core concepts of Nonviolent Communication, leaving you grounded in the basics and ready to make transformative improvements to the quality of your communication.
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Veteran CNVC Certified Trainer, Sylvia Haskvitz, reviews the key distinctions (sometimes referred to as the key differentiations) in Nonviolent Communication.
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In this audio recording, Sylvia Haskvitz, veteran CNVC Certified Trainer, offers an in-depth discussion of the Nonviolent Communication process of empathy.
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Using real-life examples from class participants, Sylvia Haskvitz demonstrates the life-changing results of clarifying the needs underlying "shoulds." Some of the situations covered in this audio are:
- A grandmother shares how she was able to spend time with her grandchildren even when experiencing estrangement from her daughter
- A father examines how to repair a conversation with his daughter
- A woman explores her "should" thinking about her financial stability, her job and grief regarding her husband's death
- A woman connects to her deeper needs that arise with the statement "I should do my taxes"
- A woman perceives that she has conflicting needs for family harmony, relaxation and comfort when deciding whether to spend holiday time with stepchildren
If your life is fraught with "shoulds," this resource will support you in translating them into needs and, in some cases, to let them go entirely.
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Veteran CNVC Certified Trainer Sylvia Haskvitz explores the phases of Knowing, Living and Teaching NVC.
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Sylvia Haskvitz offers a practical and effective approach to making requests. Learn the two questions that can clarify your motivation for making a request, three ways to discern a request from a demand, and five possible reasons for meeting requests.
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Ask the Trainer: "Recently, I was sitting in my weekly practice group trying to connect to my reasons for wanting to give empathy to a particular person. She was telling us about some painful feeling she was having, but was not connecting to her needs."
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Ask the Trainer: "I'm part of a small, self-led NVC group that's been working together for almost two years. We are experiencing some growing pains in that we're still not certain how and under what circumstances to make requests, especially negative ones."
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Reveal what's in your heart before asking a question to help build trust, especially if you're in an authority figure. Otherwise, your question may sound like a demand, blame, trap, intrusion or accusation, and it may elicit a defensive response. If you get a "question" like that, give them empathy. Read on for reflection questions to see how our revealing and our withholding impacts our relationships with others and with ourselves.
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Ask the Trainer: "I am wondering what to do with a judgment that is expressed by someone about me. In these situations I can't find the unmet need they are expressing (other than perhaps significance)."
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Ask the Trainer: "I have noticed that sometimes when I am in a story-telling mood I am usually trying to prove that I am right and once I connect with a need the urge to give all the information goes away."
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How can you ask for feedback without checking your authenticity at the workplace door? CNVC Certified Trainer Jeff Brown explains that connection requests can help by attending to the quality of your relationship before the content of your request.
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Many of us blame other people for our feelings but our own state of needs is the true cause. In this powerful audio, Sylvia teaches you how to manage your emotions in challenging situations and demonstrates the process of Screaming in Giraffe.