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Trainer Tip: We have four choices of how to respond to someone, even when they say things that are hard to hear. We can blame the speaker, blame ourselves, we can self empathize by acknowledging our feelings and needs, or we can empathize with the other person's feelings and needs. Be aware of these options and consciously make your choice based on the needs you want to meet.

Trainer Tip: Sometimes you might find yourself in a situation where your need for love is not met. Consider ways in which a partner or friend could meet your need for love. Be sure to request something the other person is capable of doing. Whatever the situation, it is our responsibility to clarify how we can meet our need for love, while also considering the abilities of our loved ones to comply with our requests.

Trainer Tip: Mourning enables us to heal the pain and gain clarity about how to meet our needs in the present moment.

Ask the Trainer: Get guidance on working with enemy images and exercises that bring relief.

Listen to this audio to learn the value of focusing on needs in an NVC model, either for the first time or as a refresher course. Living from a needs-consciousness creates abundance, clarity and choice. Using three examples from participants, Mary guides the group towards identifying and then connecting with the needs of both parties involved in each situation. It becomes clear very quickly that people choose different ways to support their needs; and many times they have the same needs in a given situation. When we understand this, we are able to create peace in our relationships and negotiations.

“Everything someone does or says is an attempt to meet a need,” says CNVC Certified Trainer Mary Mackenzie. This simple statement is a foundational understanding in Nonviolent Communication; once you gain skills at living in a “needs-consciousness” you will literally change your life and your perception of the world, and improve all of your relationships.

Ask the Trainer: "In trainings I say our jackals are thoughts and now I've come to wonder if all thoughts are jackals...?"

Learn to foster trust, peace, and cooperation in your family using Nonviolent Communication.

Explore joy through gratitude with Kathleen—stay present even amid life’s challenges.

Experience NVC tools for mediating conflict—whether you're involved or supporting others.

Explore NVC’s core elements alongside universal spiritual principles.

Do you want to befriend your needs and live without shame about them? Would you like to increase your inner freedom by letting go of attachment to outcome? Join Miki Kashtan to learn skills and practices that will enable you to want fully without attachment.

Join CNVC Certified Trainer Arnina Kashtan as explores interdependence, autonomy, valuing self and others, and power-sharing in your relationships. Free yourself to honor your longing for community, belonging, and love.

Join CNVC Certified Trainer Arnina Kashtan as she explores enemy images to increase your capacity to embrace life more fully. Free yourself from the “us-them” paradigm and experience true compassion for the people whose actions most trouble you.

Inbal answers a parent's question about praise and offers a perspective on how praise translates into the NVC framework.

Learn when to use the two types of requests in the practice of Nonviolent Communication: Action Requests and Connection Requests. Both are important when working through conflict or difficult situations and for building connection.

Eric explains how we can often avoid regret by getting empathy before making important decisions.

What are the most powerful things I can do to build an inspired relationship? I answered the question with romantic relationships in mind; however, I believe the answer below applies to all important relationships.