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  1. Trainer Tip: Take a moment to consider feelings, our conditioning about expressing or even feeling emotion, and the value of re-evaluating our relationship to feelings.

  2. Teaching People to Love Us in Ways We Enjoy

    Teaching People to Love Us in Ways We Enjoy

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 2/15/2015

    Trainer Tip: Q: How do we get the love we want? A: Ask for it.

  3. Connecting to Self

    Connecting to Self

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 3/1/2015

    Trainer Tip: Q: How do we get the love we want? A: Ask for it.

  4. Defusing Anger

    Defusing Anger

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 1/25/2018

    Trainer Tip: Many of us are afraid of our anger because we haven’t learned how to express it in a way that brings relief or that helps us meet our needs in the situation. Consider a different approach to anger, one that helps you fully express your anger and is more likely to help you meet your needs for relief, to be heard, or to be understood.

  5. Forgiving Ourselves

    Forgiving Ourselves

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 2/2/2018

    Trainer Tip: Every single time you say or do something, even when you experience pain or regret, you are trying to meet a need. Forgiveness begins when we acknowledge the needs we were trying to meet in the situation.

  6. Using Anger as a Warning

    Using Anger as a Warning

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 2/9/2018

    Trainer Tip: If you are feeling anger, you are experiencing an unmet need. When you recognize it as a warning signal, it can be a life-serving tool.

  7. Healing and Reconciliation

    Healing and Reconciliation

    (7 Session Course)

    Ike Lasater, John Kinyon

    Multi-session Course · 7 - 9 hours · 5/21/2019

    Old emotional hurts and pains can easily erupt when you’re in the throes of conflict – even if you’re the mediator. Wouldn’t it be lovely if you could avoid all of that, and instead create more peace and happiness for yourself, your family, your co-workers and your community?

  8. Noticing What Is Important

    Noticing What Is Important

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 6/10/2019

    Trainer Tip: Where do you focus most of your life? Are there areas that you could reassess? Are you happy? Engage a new paradigm shift in your life.

  9. Loving Our Role as Parent

    Loving Our Role as Parent

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 6/4/2019

    Trainer Tip: When we love a child there's a contribution we can provide in helping them go their own way successfully, in big ways and small.

  10. Making Sure We Are Heard

    Making Sure We Are Heard

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 6/16/2019

    Trainer Tip: We all see through our own filters. To disentangle what we hear from some is really saying, check using understanding requests at the level of detail you need. Course correct along the way. In a charged situation this can be critical to bringing in clarity, being heard and resolving differences amicably.

  11. Releasing Our Judgments

    Releasing Our Judgments

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 6/22/2019

    Trainer Tip: It's impossible to value other people’s needs and remain compassionate if we simultaneously harbor judgments. If we're willing to shift this behavior we can translate our judgments into acknowledging how something affects us. Once I got into the habit of this, my judgments began to subside dramatically. It became easy to love people and feel compassion for them, and I experienced a freedom I had never known before.

  12. We Don’t Need to Fix Other People

    We Don’t Need to Fix Other People

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 6/28/2019

    Trainer Tip: The very process of giving someone space to talk about their issue without our judgment, to be truly understood by us, and to be deeply heard is very healing, enough so that most people will organically find their own creative ways to resolve their issues. Rely on this process and you will lose all desire to fix people’s problems. Try this out today.

  13. Empathizing with Someone Who is Silent

    Empathizing with Someone Who is Silent

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 7/4/2019

    Trainer Tip: When someone is unresponsive it can be an opportunity to bring in more presence and connection through empathy. They may be worried that if they speak they'll say something they'll regret. Or they may want to know that their needs matters as much as yours. They may also need more space to clarify their thoughts.

  14. Punitive Use of Force

    Punitive Use of Force

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 7/10/2019

    Trainer Tip: What is motivating your (in)actions? Are you doing something in the name of supporting deeper heartfelt needs, free of judgement or blame? Or are you bringing in consequences based on viewing the other person as having "bad behaviour"?

  15. Receiving Appreciation With Grace

    Receiving Appreciation With Grace

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 7/16/2019

    Trainer Tip: If we're deflecting an appreciation or letting it expand our ego, we're missing a chance to truly connect to what's important. A more satisfying way to receive appreciation is to connect to how we've contributed to another person’s life, rather than our own.

  16. Mediating with a Group

    Mediating with a Group

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 7/29/2019

    Trainer Tip: People struggle to come to agreement when they don’t feel heard. So as a mediator, facilitate the process by asking all parties to reflect the essence of what's important to other parties. This is critical. Once everyone is confident that their needs have been heard, you'll notice the energy in the room relaxing. Then you can brainstorm strategies that will value everyone’s needs, and are focused on what they want to happen.

  17. Honesty as a Means to Connect

    Honesty as a Means to Connect

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 8/10/2019

    Trainer Tip: Notice an opportunity today to use honesty as a means to connect with someone else. Consider what type of honesty might stimulate pain in others.

  18. Observing without Judgment

    Observing without Judgment

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 8/19/2019

    Trainer Tip: Today, identify the facts, without adding your ideas about why people behave in certain ways. Then consider connecting with the person about what was going on with them. You will find that the more you observe life without judgment and evaluation, the more open you will be to hearing and connecting with other people.

  19. Doing Something Different

    Doing Something Different

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 9/3/2019

    Trainer Tip: Commit to doing one thing right now that will bring you closer to meeting a need today. Do it today. Don’t put it off. This is your life.

  20. Perceiving Reality

    Perceiving Reality

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 9/12/2019

    Trainer Tip: When we try to make another person fit into a reality that we prefer in order to meet our own needs everyone suffers. Instead, bring your focus back to yourself. Notice which of your needs are met or unmet when you spend time with someone. Don’t judge them; just focus on your feelings and needs. Then, decide whether continuing the relationship will meet them.

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