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  1. Forgiving Ourselves

    Forgiving Ourselves

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 2/2/2018

    Trainer Tip: Every single time you say or do something, even when you experience pain or regret, you are trying to meet a need. Forgiveness begins when we acknowledge the needs we were trying to meet in the situation.

  2. Overcoming Patriarchy 5-7-2017

    Overcoming Patriarchy 5-7-2017

    Miki Kashtan

    Audio · 1 hour, 12 minutes · 2/11/2018

    The focus on patriarchy emerges from the understanding that patriarchy plays a foundational role in everything. Yes, I mean it: everything. Patriarchy is not the same as sexism; patriarchy is to sexism very much what structural racism is to (interpersonal) racism: it's a system that runs independently of any one person's attitudes or behaviors. Join Miki for her first in a series of discussions on patriarchy.

  3. Empathizing with Someone Who is Silent

    Empathizing with Someone Who is Silent

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 7/4/2019

    Trainer Tip: When someone is unresponsive it can be an opportunity to bring in more presence and connection through empathy. They may be worried that if they speak they'll say something they'll regret. Or they may want to know that their needs matters as much as yours. They may also need more space to clarify their thoughts.

  4. Trainer Tip: Making a request is critical because it can greatly lessen any tension in the situation. Plus, it can clarify for you and the people in your life what it would take to meet your need. Make at least one specific and doable request to someone today.

  5. Trainer tip: People often presume why something happened before checking with the other person. Instead, if we were to name the facts of what happened through observation without adding in our own judgments or reasons why we think it happened, we can more easily open the possibility for deeper connection with the other person. Read on for more on making observations.

  6. Love Trumps Everything

    Love Trumps Everything

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 5/30/2021

    Trainer Tip: When looking for a solution take the time to consider and connect to other's needs rather than just focusing on getting what you want. Such a basic shift in consciousness can make a profound difference in your relationships, both personal and professional. Notice how you feel afterward.

  7. This telecourse recording is for anyone wanting to integrate empathy into his/her life in a more natural, authentic way.

  8. Communicating Our Deepest Desires

    Communicating Our Deepest Desires

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 6/26/2021

    Trainer Tip: When we "protect" ourselves by not asking for what we want, we block ourselves from getting our needs met. From here, disappointment and resentment can build -- especially if this is a pattern. Instead, notice when you're tempted to do this, and be honest and upfront about what you want to improve the quality of your relationships.

  9. The Value of Change

    The Value of Change

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 12/29/2021

    Trainer Tip: Wanting collaboration? Show you value the other person's needs as much as your own. After you both feel heard, you can make joint decisions about specifics of the agreement, such as "division of work", "scope of project", "when the action will take place", "how it'll be done" and "timing of follow up to see how things went". Read on for an example of how this is applied to asking someone to pitch in with doing chores.

  10. I Want To Connect More Than I Want To Be Right

    I Want To Connect More Than I Want To Be Right

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 1/7/2022

    Trainer Tip: We have a better chance of getting our needs met if we prioritize connecting with one another's needs more than being right. This way we can reduce the chances of conflict arising. We also increase the possibility we can find ways everyone’s needs can be met.

  11. Facing Life as One

    Facing Life as One

    Miki Kashtan

    Live Zoom Course · ·

    • Learn concrete tools for engaging with others as you embrace individual and collective liberation
    • Find your own source of choice even in the face of challenges
    • Release the constriction of scarcity
    • Find an empowered option to respond to what is happening in our world
    • Open the door to the possibility of thriving rather than merely surviving
  12. Sometimes I Can’t Get Past My Judgments

    Sometimes I Can’t Get Past My Judgments

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 8/4/2022

    Trainer Tip: Whether we listen to our own or the other person’s needs first, connecting to needs can help us release judgments of others, see their humanness, help us to begin to hear them and ultimately connect to them. Be aware today of times when you are judging someone. Then be aware of your own needs to improve your connection to them.

  13. Creating More Efficient Meetings

    Creating More Efficient Meetings

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 8/22/2022

    Trainer Tip: Meetings can be unproductive when the participants aren’t clear about their needs or what they want from the group. When participants express opinions without expressing a need or informing the group of what they want, the meeting lacks clarity. Instead, if we can focus on naming our needs and make related requests, we can get closer to resolution much faster and enjoy the process more. Read on for an example.

  14. The Long-Short Way, And The Short-Long Way

    The Long-Short Way, And The Short-Long Way

    Alan Rafael Seid

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 8/10/2022

    Some things may seem to take longer at first, but end up making things easier and faster. Other things seem easier or faster in the short term, but end up taking more time in the long run. This applies to projects, group agreements about process, relationships, addressing conflicts, clearing up misunderstandings, damage control, etc. It can be faster to slow down, be more present, and take the time since we care about the outcome.

  15. Heaven And Hell

    Heaven And Hell

    Alan Rafael Seid

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 9/3/2022

    Read this short Japanese parable that symbolically illustrates the outcomes of having a competitive mindset – in contrast to an interdependent, collaborative one where everyone wins. It’s a story that encapsulates part of the spirit of NVC.

  16. The Future of Love

    The Future of Love

    (6 Session Course)

    Kelly Bryson

    Multi-session Course · 8 - 10 hours · 8/15/2022

    If you are tired of feeling dissatisfied, frustrated and hopeless about experiencing ease and joy in your intimate relationships, this course is for you! Please join CNVC Certified Trainer and long-time relationship expert, Kelly Bryson, in this course to rethink and relive your perception of love so you can actually feel love, let love in and be love.

  17. Enjoying The Process

    Enjoying The Process

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 12/15/2022

    Trainer Tip: Notice where you're judging or blaming people for not meeting your needs. Strive instead to notice and name the related feelings and needs longing to be met. Ask a question to check with the other person about what they want and need. This can open up the conversation towards mutually beneficial solutions.

  18. Becoming Regenerative

    Becoming Regenerative

    John Kinyon

    Trainer Tips · 3 - 4 minutes · 1/29/2023

    The regeneration movement employs practices for healing our planet from damage, and boosting Earth sustainability. Environmental and social degradation is deeply connected -- as it comes from the same extractive, exploitive mindset of economic and related systems. Connecting with universal consciousness and needs underlying conflicts, we connect with commonality of all planetary life. This helps tap new abilities for working together. This can contain power to regenerate and heal ourselves and Earth.

  19. Myths Of Power With

    Myths Of Power With

    Everyone Can Be Included

    Miki Kashtan

    Articles · 7 - 12 minutes · 7/13/2023

    Total inclusion is impossible: inclusion of all can often lead to exclusion of those who can't bear the behaviors of some. Many groups flounder and disintegrate because of too much inclusion. Limited resources and capacities may make it necessary to exclude. Keeping more coherent shared values and strategies may be another reason to place membership conditions so that what appears to be exclusion may give movements a chance to expand.

  20. Listening, The Next Step

    Listening, The Next Step

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 6/1/2023

    Trainer Tip: In our effort to be heard, we often forget to listen. In fact, your need to be heard will not be met completely until you have heard how what you said affects the other person. If we want to ensure that we're heard we can ask the other person to reflect what they heard us say. And we can hear what's going on with them. It is important to remember that a dialogue is not complete until both people have been heard.

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