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  1. Acknowleding that the Needs are the Same!

    Acknowleding that the Needs are the Same!

    Mary Mackenzie

    Video · 0.5 minute · 01/13/2024

    Have you ever found yourself passing judgment on a co-worker's seemingly disorganized desk? Mary Mackenzie's experience sheds light on the fact that she and her colleague with the "messy desk" shared a common need for order. Recognizing that our needs align can lead to a softening of judgments, creating space for connection, understanding, and harmony.

  2. A Talk About Needs

    A Talk About Needs

    Mary Mackenzie

    Audio · 10 minutes · 7/29/2010

    Listen to this audio to learn the value of focusing on needs in an NVC model, either for the first time or as a refresher course. Living from a needs-consciousness creates abundance, clarity and choice. Using three examples from participants, Mary guides the group towards identifying and then connecting with the needs of both parties involved in each situation. It becomes clear very quickly that people choose different ways to support their needs; and many times they have the same needs in a given situation. When we understand this, we are able to create peace in our relationships and negotiations.

    “Everything someone does or says is an attempt to meet a need,” says CNVC Certified Trainer Mary Mackenzie. This simple statement is a foundational understanding in Nonviolent Communication; once you gain skills at living in a “needs-consciousness” you will literally change your life and your perception of the world, and improve all of your relationships.

  3. Experience the remarkable healing power of self-empathy, guided by CNVC Certified Trainers, Mary Mackenzie and Raj Gill. In this audio course, the trainers lead participants through a demonstration, and then supplement the learning with discussion and answers to questions.
  4. In this brief video, CNVC Certified Trainer and Inner Relationship Focusing Guide and teacher, Gina Cenciose, teaches that our inner relationship is the basis for both Focusing and NVC work.

  5. Being Yourself And Asking For What You Want

    Being Yourself And Asking For What You Want

    Elia Lowe-Chardé

    Articles · 7 - 11 minutes · 9/30/2021

    Let's look at the resources, awareness, and skills needed to ask for emotional attunement, celebration, relatedness, perspective, understanding, advice, and information. This includes expressing appreciation for what's supporting your needs, strengthening a sense of worthiness, and awareness of your reactivity and intention. Plus, making requests that are clear, specific, doable and creates a heart connection with others.

  6. Working With Anger

    Working With Anger

    An Exercise

    Inbal Kashtan, Miki Kashtan

    Practice Exercises · 2 - 3 minutes · 1/22/2022

    Fully connecting to the deeper need under the anger can transform and release the anger, without requiring the other person to do anything differently. From there, you can reach an understanding of the other person's experience, feelings and needs underlying the actions that stimulated your anger to re-establish connection with your own and the other person's humanity.

  7. How to Enjoy Your Family Dinner

    How to Enjoy Your Family Dinner

    Miki Kashtan

    Audio · 49 minutes · 9/18/2013

    If you dread family gatherings because of family tensions, you can find ways to excavate through piles of hardened judgments and hopelessness, build on your inner strength, and engage with family conflicts with open-hearted curiosity, greater presence, and connecting with what really matters to everyone.

  8. The Heart and Science of Empathy

    The Heart and Science of Empathy

    (5 Session Course)

    Eric Bowers

    Multi-session Course · 6 - 8 hours · 3/8/2020

    Join CNVC Certified Trainer Eric Bowers in journeying through the world of Interpersonal Neurobiology (IPNB) as he expands on the theories and tools from his book Meet Me In Hard-to-Love Places: The Heart and Science of Relationship Success. You'll discover why IPNB and NVC complement each other so well, especially in the powerful practice of Somatic-Based Resonant Empathy.

  9. Taking on the World

    Taking on the World

    How to Become a Change Agent (12 Session Course)

    Miki Kashtan

    Multi-session Course · 14 - 18 hours · 3/1/2021

    Are you eager to translate your vision of a world where everyone’s needs matter into a tangible reality? Do you long to discover your unique role in responding to the challenges of our times? If, so join Miki for 12 sessions that will propel you on your way!

  10. Among NVC practitioners, empathy can be superficial. How open are you to being influenced by what others are saying? Do you reflect back and then guard and remain within your position of being right, even as you say otherwise? Only when we're eager to be influenced by what they say can we connect, expand our world and thus, shift the field. Without such openness we fool ourselves into thinking we are truly empathic listeners.

  11. Not Trusting the “Yes”

    Not Trusting the “Yes”

    Miki Kashtan

    Audio · 19 minutes · 7/28/2010

    In this audio recording, Miki demonstrates how to stay in a dialogue when you don't trust someone's "yes," how to equalize power between people and how to allow space for others to say "no" to our requests.

  12. It Takes a Community to Raise a Relationship

    It Takes a Community to Raise a Relationship

    Eric Bowers

    Articles · 5 - 8 minutes · 7/29/2010

    Using his own life experience, Eric explores why we need support from others, what support might look like, and what blocks us from asking for support for our relationships.

  13. NVC “Reality TV”

    NVC “Reality TV”

    (4 Session Course)

    Catherine Cadden, Jesse Wiens

    Multi-session Course · 3 hours, 44 minutes · 4/23/2017

    If role-play, hearing conversations modeled, and dialogue practice is how you learn, this 4-part telecourse recording is for you! Learn the art of entering into, staying in, and bowing out of “the dance” of communication, playing with your real-life situations using the four components of Nonviolent Communciation as the foundation.

  14. NVC Dialogue Lab

    NVC Dialogue Lab

    (5 Session Course)

    Catherine Cadden, Jesse Wiens

    Multi-session Course · 6 hours, 28 minutes · 10/26/2017

    If role play, hearing conversations modeled and dialogue practice is how you learn, this is the telecourse recording for you! Learn the art of entering, staying in and bowing out of the conversational dance using real-life situations.

  15. The NVC Model

    The NVC Model

    A Map to Your Intentions

    Dian Killian

    Articles · 4 - 6 minutes · 3/16/2019

    The more we practice NVC by “rote” --going through OFNR (“Observations, Feelings, Needs, Requests”) on automatic-- the more likely our NVC practice would lead to disconnection.  The purpose of our NVC practice is to use this NVC "map" (OFNR) to support us in integrating the consciousness of the NVC (eg. operating with the intention to connect, collaborate, etc).  Once we let the map drop away, we can engage with the people in our lives in a more heartfelt way.  This article explains more about how we can use the map to remind us of our  heartfelt consciousness...

  16. Self-Empathy Regulation Process

    Self-Empathy Regulation Process

    Eric Bowers

    Practice Exercises · 30 minutes · 8/10/2021

    Building your body and mind awareness can help you better regulate/calm your emotions.  Regular self-empathy will help you better regulate your emotions as well as increase your body and mind awareness.  If you are not aware of amygdala activation (fight/flight/freeze response), you will react instead of responding with choice. Use this eight-step process to develop your self-empathy/regulation skills.

  17. Looking at “Shoulds”

    Looking at “Shoulds”

    Sylvia Haskvitz

    Audio · 22 minutes · 4/22/2024

    Using real-life examples from class participants, Sylvia Haskvitz demonstrates the life-changing results of clarifying the needs underlying "shoulds." Some of the situations covered in this audio are:

    • A grandmother shares how she was able to spend time with her grandchildren even when experiencing estrangement from her daughter
    • A father examines how to repair a conversation with his daughter
    • A woman explores her "should" thinking about her financial stability, her job and grief regarding her husband's death
    • A woman connects to her deeper needs that arise with the statement "I should do my taxes"
    • A woman perceives that she has conflicting needs for family harmony, relaxation and comfort when deciding whether to spend holiday time with stepchildren

    If your life is fraught with "shoulds," this resource will support you in translating them into needs and, in some cases, to let them go entirely.

  18. Control as a Need

    Control as a Need

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 7/29/2010

    Trainer Tip: "I often hear people say that someone did something because of a need for control. Control is actually a strategy that is often confused with a need."

  19. This telecourse recording gives NVC Practitioners a guided tour of Ken Wilber’s work, a meta-theory (theory of theories) that includes as much knowledge and wisdom from as many sources as possible. You will explore how NVC and Integral Framework mesh, overlap and complement each other.

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