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NVC Resources on Mourning

  1. Exercise In Self Compassion

    Exercise In Self Compassion

    Robert Gonzales

    Practice Exercises · 1 - 3 minutes · 3/2/2022

    With this exercise you'll choose an experience you had with someone where your needs were not met. You'll work with the related feelings, judgements, values, and feeling the fullness of the need even though it was not met, plus any sadness that may arise.

  2. Modeling Our Values With Our Children

    Modeling Our Values With Our Children

    Roxy Manning

    Video · 3 min 34 sec · 5/3/2024

    As parents, aligning our values with our actual behavior can be challenging. In this video, Roxy discusses the importance of modeling behavior for children, both in how they handle challenges and in their overall approach to life. Her message encourages using real-life examples to show that everyone is a work in progress and that it's okay not to be perfect.

  3. Connecting Feelings and Needs

    Connecting Feelings and Needs

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 11/2/2014

    Trainer Tip: When we connect our feelings to our needs, we put ourselves in a postion to get our needs met and mourn when they aren't met. Here's a practical tip you can practice daily to improve the quality of your life.

  4. Finding Your Way from Judgment to Discernment

    Finding Your Way from Judgment to Discernment

    LaShelle Lowe-Chardé

    Practice Exercises · 2 - 4 minutes · 01/01/2024

    Judgment is an attempt to protect from hopelessness or insecurity, at high cost. Instead, check in with fear, grief, or hurt. Then wonder what needs are at stake for everyone. This makes space for grief instead of anger, for negotiation rather than control, and for "calling in" rather than excluding. Wonder: “For whom would this be life-serving or not?”, “What strategies would care for all needs?” or, “What can I contribute now?”

  5. Miki Kashtan hosted Living Room Radio Show on KPFA Radio 94.1FM in Berkeley, California, USA. Listen as she works with a a woman whose relationship is challenged by what happens when her lover drinks. In this segment, Miki encourages the caller to get support for her stress, find an outlet for it and receive empathy. Miki addresses the challenges of addiction, the self-judgment of trying to meet needs by drinking and the pain this causes for everyone involved. She further suggests that the caller try to connect to the needs he is trying to meet by drinking, and to identify those that are actually being met and those that aren’t.

  6. Living the Self-in-Life

    Living the Self-in-Life

    Presence and Self-Compassion

    Robert Gonzales

    Audio · 30 minutes · 10/1/2016

    During this very moving session, you'll dive into Robert's exercises for supporting connection to your true self as opposed to your conditioned self.

  7. Read how an American Buddhist NVC teacher with Jewish roots reflects on how any dehumanization in the Israel-Hamas conflict can be used to justify all kinds of violence that can escalate for generations. With acknowledgment of the complexities, his desire is for us to bring in respect, dignity and peace -- for both Israelis and Palestinians. He emphasizes compassionate advocacy of all humanity amid the ongoing crisis.

  8. Steps Towards Meaningful Action

    Steps Towards Meaningful Action

    Miki Kashtan

    Articles · 4 - 6 minutes · 9/18/2019

    We're in difficult times - possibly at the brink of extinction. What can we do in response? Some nonlinear steps: A.) Notice what isn't working; B.) Mourn so that we can move "towards" from an expanded space inside; C.) Analyze to bring a fuller understanding of what's happening and what's needed; D.) Reframe our inner and outer narratives; E.) Discern what we can contribute; F.) Care; and G.) Bring in support for more resilience and creativity.

  9. Helping Another Find Willingess

    Helping Another Find Willingess

    LaShelle Lowe-Chardé

    Articles · 4 - 6 minutes · 1/16/2020

    Is there someone you wish was more willing? Try guessing what obstacles they might be struggling with. And allow yourself to feel your grief. As you grapple with your own desire for someone to find their willingness, its essential to recognize that this is about you and your needs. You can also express your needs honestly, make requests for how to collaborate, and be responsive to what they want. Read on for more on this, plus four common ways someone’s willingness might be blocked.

  10. Offering Presence For Repetitive Fears

    Offering Presence For Repetitive Fears

    LaShelle Lowe-Chardé

    Articles · 3 - 5 minutes · 10/15/2021

    Three things can be helpful to practice when you want to contribute to someone caught in repetitive fears: self empathy, allowing grief for what you wish was true and is not, and empathy for their difficulty. You can also ask them what's helpful.

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