NVC Resources on Judgment
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Trainer Tip: There's often a large gap between what we experience, and the story we make up about it. Noticing how our judgments and assumptions cloud our observations can be critical to creating a connection with others and maintaining a Nonviolent Communication consciousness.
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Naturalizing NVC Language
(7 Session Course)
Learn to speak NVC using your own voice and increase ease and flow in all your personal and professional conversations. This 7-session telecourse recording with renowned trainer Miki Kashtan is designed to help you integrate NVC into all aspects of your life by gaining fluency in your practice of NVC and by embodying the principles regardless of the words you use. This course is based on intensive practice and coaching with real-life examples from participants’ lives.
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Trainer Tip: Have you ever noticed that some of your behaviors ensure that your needs for peace and relief won’t be met? Take judgments for instance. The more we have, the less peaceful and happy we feel.
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Observation is the awareness of our sensory perceptions and thoughts, separate from evaluations and judgments. Feeling involves bodily sensations and emotions, distinct from "faux feelings" that mix thought and emotion. Needs encompass universal human requirements for survival and wellness, while thoughts and evaluations express needs. Requests are rooted in connection and invite true willingness, rather than demanding compliance.
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In this potent audio, expert trainer Miki Kashtan demonstrates the eye-opening experience of translating judgments into needs. She works with a mother who is stuck in a loop of feeling judged by family members and judging them back.
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Trainer Tip: One of the swiftest ways to close our hearts is having judgmental thinking or looking to get our way. How open are you when you're in this mode? The goal in peaceful living is to approach our relationships with an open heart. Start conversations today with an intention to connect with other people.
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In moments where we would like to see change, personal growth or spiritual transformation, rather than immediately acting to make a change, Robert suggests we practice unconditional self-acceptance through a spacious presence to our inner experience. Robert asks us to give our attention and spacious awareness to our own judgments, inner contractions, and other experiences we often regard as undesirable.
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Have you ever found yourself passing judgment on a co-worker's seemingly disorganized desk? Mary Mackenzie's experience sheds light on the fact that she and her colleague with the "messy desk" shared a common need for order. Recognizing that our needs align can lead to a softening of judgments, creating space for connection, understanding, and harmony.
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Miki demonstrates how to work with judgmental thinking, offering a two-step process to shift from right/wrong thinking about our disagreements to a more open-hearted state of being.
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Yoram Mosenzon discusses judgmental dialogue and its hidden aim to meet needs. This often creates distance instead of fostering connection. Yoram introduces a self-connection exercise to improve the chances of dialogue becoming more enriching and life-serving.