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NVC Resources on Observation

  1. Roxy Manning discusses the need to expand our understanding of observations within Nonviolent Communication (NVC). She challenges the idea of objective observation, noting its limitations, and introduces internal observations, citing personal experiences to illustrate their influence on emotions and self-perception. Additionally, she emphasizes systemic awareness as a crucial aspect of observation, highlighting its importance in understanding broader societal issues. Overall, Roxy advocates for a comprehensive approach to observations in NVC, incorporating external, internal, and systemic perspectives to foster inclusivity and empathy.

  2. Increasing Presence Through Observations

    Increasing Presence Through Observations

    John Kinyon

    Practice Exercises · 26 minutes · 9/8/2010

    John Kinyon leads participants through two Observation Exercises to strengthen their ability to be present.  Through the exercises, John distinguishes the difference between feelings, which are emotions felt inside the body, and observations which are witness to our experience.

  3. In this brief audio snippet, CNVC Certified Trainer and founder of the CNVC Parenting Project, Inbal Kashtan, explores observation in contrast to interpretation, and leads an exercise in observation skills.

  4. Separating Observations And Evaluations

    Separating Observations And Evaluations

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 01/27/2023

    Trainer Tip: Oftentimes, when we mix an evaluation and observation, we promote defensiveness in other people. When we are able to separate the two, we are more likely to create opportunities to promote open dialogue about our concerns. Be aware of your evaluations and observations today.

  5. 3 Levels of Observation

    3 Levels of Observation

    Roxy Manning

    Video · 5 min 38 sec · 2/22/2024

    There is more to the NVC skill of Observation than the external level of what a video camera sees or hears. In this video, Roxy demonstrates that to fully understand what is happening, we need to know all three layers of observation: External, Internal, and Systemic. 

  6. Unpacking Observations

    Unpacking Observations

    Roxy Manning

    Articles · 4 - 6 minutes · 12/18/2022

    Many people consider a true observation as something that all can agree on. Some people use the video camera analogy – a true observation is “what a video camera can see and hear.” This perpetuates the myth of the neutral, unbiased observer. There are three layers of observation: External, Internal, and Systemic. Understanding these layers is key to connecting with the depth of the needs, and to create greater shared understanding.

  7. Trainer tip: People often presume why something happened before checking with the other person. Instead, if we were to name the facts of what happened through observation without adding in our own judgments or reasons why we think it happened, we can more easily open the possibility for deeper connection with the other person. Read on for more on making observations.

  8. Observing

    Observing

    Practicing the distinction between "observation" and "observation mixed with evaluation"

    Jim & Jori Manske

    Practice Exercises · 1 - 2 minutes · 1/18/2021

    Recalling Krishnamurti, Marshall referred to the capability of distinguishing observation vs observation mixed with evaluation as "the highest form of human intelligence." Read on for an exercise to help practice the skill of observation in combination with mindful walking.

  9. In this enlightening Trainer Conversation, three veteran CNVC Certified Trainers discuss whether NVC can be learned without first learning Observations, Feelings, Needs, Requests (OFNR). The conversation naturally meanders as the trainers grapple with the question, eventually covering a wide-range of topics including the spirituality and true essence of NVC.

  10. Observation is the awareness of our sensory perceptions and thoughts, separate from evaluations and judgments. Feeling involves bodily sensations and emotions, distinct from "faux feelings" that mix thought and emotion. Needs encompass universal human requirements for survival and wellness, while thoughts and evaluations express needs. Requests are rooted in connection and invite true willingness, rather than demanding compliance.
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