

NVC Resources on Observation
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Observation is the awareness of our sensory perceptions and thoughts, separate from evaluations and judgments. Feeling involves bodily sensations and emotions, distinct from "faux feelings" that mix thought and emotion. Needs encompass universal human requirements for survival and wellness, while thoughts and evaluations express needs. Requests are rooted in connection and invite true willingness, rather than demanding compliance.
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John Kinyon teaches mindfulness and how to translate thoughts into clear observations.
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Mediating a conflict conversation can be challenging – but with tools and practice, that challenge can be transformed. If you're curious about the specific steps needed to achieve that transformation, join John for an exploration of his non-dual mindfulness practice.
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Trainer Tip: Notice when you create stories about why something occurred. Commit to only observing facts. Then make decisions that are likely to give you relief and joy. For instance, if someone is late you may think that she’s inconsiderate or values another thing more than you. Instead, observe what you know—that she's later than agreed. From there, you could call her to find out what’s going on.
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There's a growing trend to elevate feelings and personal truths (aka MY truth) to the point of being unassailable "facts". If I feel unsafe, then it must be because of you. As valid as a person’s inner world is, we risk overlooking what's beyond our own views, such as larger forces around us that continue to underwrite exploitation, violence, “othering”, etc. Instead, describe specific words and actions that a camera would record.
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Dian Killian reframes the four NVC steps into simple, practical language for workplace use.
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Trainer Tip: Today, identify the facts, without adding your ideas about why people behave in certain ways. Then consider connecting with the person about what was going on with them. You will find that the more you observe life without judgment and evaluation, the more open you will be to hearing and connecting with other people.
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John introduces his Self-Connection Exercise as a mindful way of coming to awareness via OFNR. Breath: immediately observable, a reminder to observe. Body: feeling the body, awareness of sensations. Needs: an experience of wholeness that expands awareness of the totality of experience. Listen.
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Why is it so difficult to change our patterns even when we want to, even when we experience shame or despair about them? Arnina Kashtan offers some of the common pitfalls and concrete steps to overcome them in the future.
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2020 has added three major global crises to our long and painful list of ongoing challenges:
- Public health crisis emerging from the Coronavirus infecting humans;
- Governance crisis manifesting especially in global protests against police brutality and governments more generally; and
- Economic crisis unfolding from responses to the pandemic.
And as a result, many of us who share NVC with others have been feeling a growing unease about our roles. I have heard from quite a few who want to go beyond using NVC primarily as a personal growth tool within the market economy, and often don't know how to do so. This course is designed to respond to this need by supporting anyone who shares NVC with others – regardless of experience or certification – in opening to the way systemic perspectives deepen and transform how we bring NVC to people, communities, and organizations.

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