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We can see anger as an alarm or signal that can inform us that unmet needs require attention, or that we hold judgements. We can shift our own anger in several healthy ways: get present, identify the stimulus and any judgements or unmet needs, look for ways to meet our needs, make requests that support our needs, express our needs to ourselves and appropriate others, and more.

Miki Kashtan hosted Living Room Radio Show on KPFA Radio 94.1FM in Berkeley, California, USA. Listen as she works with a a woman whose relationship is challenged by what happens when her lover drinks. In this segment, Miki encourages the caller to get support for her stress, find an outlet for it and receive empathy. Miki addresses the challenges of addiction, the self-judgment of trying to meet needs by drinking and the pain this causes for everyone involved. She further suggests that the caller try to connect to the needs he is trying to meet by drinking, and to identify those that are actually being met and those that aren’t.

In this inspiring audio, Mary takes to a more profound level the traditional NVC self-empathy process of identifying judgments, feelings and needs, by adding a "wrapping" component.

Trainer tip: Judging others can affect our ability to communicate effectively with that person, or enjoy the relationship. Translating the static judgments (enemy images) we have of others into our own and others' feelings and needs can help us move into greater understanding, healing, and relief -- which can foster compassion and connection. Read on for more.

Trainer Tip: When we express appreciation using words like "good", "great" or anything else evaluative, it conveys we are in the position to judge, and that we've judged them or their actions. Instead, to express appreciation without judgment state what they did, how you feel about what they did, and which of your needs are met by their behavior. Such an expression of appreciation clearly states how your life was enriched, without judgement.

Ask the Trainer: Dealing with judgments about you when the speaker's true unmet need is hidden.

Rita learns the power of silent empathy while visiting her daughter and offering unsolicited advice.

Inbal Kashtan answers the age-old question: Why do children do things to annoy parents?

Exploring how blame hides our inner voice and fuels pain through self-judgment and stories.

Discover how replacing “niceness” with honesty, passion, and compassion restores aliveness.

Kelly Bryson shows how clear intention and awareness transform pain into growth.

Exploring how stories and unmet needs each influence the cause of our feelings in NVC.

Ingrid guides parents to navigate everyday parenting challenges using the NVC model, such as the behavior of a frustrated child, a messy room, transition times and a child who collapses when things don't work out as she had hoped.

Wes Taylor leads young people in a lively discussion on understanding and working with anger.

This telecourse recording provides an experience with the language, skills and consciousness of NVC applied to mediating all types of conflict whether you are one of the people in conflict or you are supporting others in conflict.

This 6-session telecourse recording focuses on supporting people who work with children (e.g. parents, teachers, ministers, etc.) in applying the skills of NVC mediation in conflict situations that involve children.

This 4 session telecourse recording offers practices while exploring the relationship between the core elements of NVC and universal spiritual principles.

The human brain is a conservative organ that comprises different systems with varying degrees of conscious awareness, which evolved in three basic stages of human history (the lizard-squirrel-monkey brain.) In my understanding, we could say, the brain has strong needs for understanding, order, predictability and meaning. In fact, one of its key functions is to process experiences, and predict what the world is like, in order to maximize survival.  CNVC Certified Trainer Stephanie Bachmann Mattei explores the biological basis of our inner jackal voices.