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  1. Self-Empathy

    Self-Empathy

    A Direct Route to Personal Healing

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 5/24/2017

    Trainer Tip: It is true that we cannot fully understand other people until we understand ourselves. Gain understanding and healing through self-empathy within the Compassionate Communication process.

  2. Punitive Use of Force

    Punitive Use of Force

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 7/10/2019

    Trainer Tip: What is motivating your (in)actions? Are you doing something in the name of supporting deeper heartfelt needs, free of judgement or blame? Or are you bringing in consequences based on viewing the other person as having "bad behaviour"?

  3. Clarifying Our Needs

    Clarifying Our Needs

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 11/2/2019

    Trainer Tip: We often find ourselves slipping into old behaviors that we would rather change. This is because we don’t have a new plan for responding to the same old situations. In that case, notice whether you are slipping into old behaviors today. Connect to your unmet needs and then identify a new strategy for the situation.

  4. Trainer Tip: Making a request is critical because it can greatly lessen any tension in the situation. Plus, it can clarify for you and the people in your life what it would take to meet your need. Make at least one specific and doable request to someone today.

  5. Specificity Is the Key

    Specificity Is the Key

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 4/2/2020

    Trainer Tip: If you make a specific and doable request as soon as you notice your needs, you'll have a better possibility of getting them met. It's also more likely your request will support the other person to contribute to your life. Make at least one specific, doable request of someone today as soon as you notice your needs.

  6. The Top Five Deal Breakers in Relationships

    The Top Five Deal Breakers in Relationships

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 3/15/2020

    Trainer Tip: When considering your "deal breakers" consider what you want from a relationship rather than how it will look. For instance, maybe my need for abundance can be met by someone who is independently wealthy, so he doesn’t have to “have a good job”. When you shift your focus from strategies to needs, you may be pleasantly surprised what the universe brings. Read on for more.

  7. Nothing but the Facts

    Nothing but the Facts

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 7/10/2020

    Trainer Tip: There's often a large gap between what we experience, and the story we make up about it. Noticing how our judgments and assumptions cloud our observations can be critical to creating a connection with others and maintaining a Nonviolent Communication consciousness.

  8. The Jackal as a Teacher

    The Jackal as a Teacher

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 5/26/2020

    Trainer tip: Why do NVC practitioners sometimes use the jackal as a metaphor in the NVC world? What can it teach us? Read on for more.

  9. Stimulus vs. Cause

    Stimulus vs. Cause

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 6/22/2020

    Trainer tip: Notice how the exact same actions can stimulate different feelings depending on if your needs are met or unmet. So while what people say or do is the stimulus, the actual cause of our feelings comes from our met or unmet needs. Read on for more on this.

  10. Connection, Connection, Connection

    Connection, Connection, Connection

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 2 - 3 minutes · 11/22/2020

    Trainer tip: Do you get into “right fights”? You know you’re in one when you’re arguing with somebody in order to be right or because you want to win. What needs do I hope to meet from winning or being right? Notice if you enter into a right fight today and shift your focus to your needs and connecting with the other person's needs.

  11. Transforming Complaint

    Transforming Complaint

    Jim & Jori Manske

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 1/30/2021

    Trainer Tip: NVC-based social change naturally emerges from “a certain kind of spirituality”, a quality of spiritual clarity. Intuitions and impulses arising from spiritual clarity are more likely to support sustainable systems. Read on for how to bring more of this in, and ways to transform your complaint into commitment.

  12. For many people, attempting to connect with others across differences can feel akin to walking through a minefield. With humility, tenderness, and courage, Roxy challenges your perspectives and encourages you to open your heart and mind. Roxy uses concrete examples and visual tools to illustrate complex concepts.

  13. Defining Needs

    Defining Needs

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 2/20/2021

    In NVC we define needs as resources that life requires to sustain itself. All human beings have the same needs. The strategy is what we do to meet that need. Strategies are specific; we all choose unique ways to meet our needs. The more we can see the difference between the two, the more likely we are to resolve conflicts with ease. Today, look for opportunities to notice the difference in the given situation.

  14. Overcoming Insecurity in Friendships

    Overcoming Insecurity in Friendships

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 3/10/2021

    Instead of wondering, invest time today to ask at least one friend your friendship enhances her life. Such clarification can deepen the connection.

  15. Convergent Facilitation

    Convergent Facilitation

    Miki Kashtan

    Downloadable Courses · ·

    If you’ve ever dreaded attending a meeting – or watched in dismay as your group collapses into conflict – know that a methodology known as Convergent Facilitation offers you possible solutions. It’s based on one simple experience: that people come together at the level of their underlying principles, needs, aspirations, and dreams, not at the level of their surface positions.

    Convergent Facilitation is a highly efficient decision-making process developed by Miki Kashtan from the principles of Nonviolent Communication. It enables you to look beneath the surface and find the essence of what’s important to different stakeholders, and bring it together into one set of principles that lead to proposals and ultimately decisions. As a result, it readily produces solutions and decisions that everyone can embrace.

    • Discern what is preventing your communication style from being effective
    • Create a communication style that works
    • Resolve everyday conflicts and misunderstandings
    • Create a deeper sense of connection, trust, and cooperation
    • Heal old wounds between you and others, as well as within yourself
    • Be the leader and contributor you want to be in any situation
  16. What’s Important to You?

    What’s Important to You?

    Penny Wassman

    Practice Exercises · 2 pages · 7/29/2010

    This exercise is most often the first activity in a beginning level workshop after the usual logistics/history/check-in. Penny Wassman experiences it as an opportunity for people to build connection with one another.

  17. Different Types of Requests

    Different Types of Requests

    Miki Kashtan

    Trainer Tips · 2 - 3 minutes · 7/28/2010

    Ask the Trainer: "Could you share a list of types of requests, with examples of each and a possible strategy for formulating requests in conversation?"

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