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  1. How to Use NVC with Talkative Friends

    How to Use NVC with Talkative Friends

    Liv Larsson

    Trainer Tips · 21 minutes · 7/28/2010

    Ask the Trainer: "Could you explore why people 'talk too much' and how I could connect with them and myself empathically when I'm also talking too much?"

  2. Protective Use of Force with Children

    Protective Use of Force with Children

    Godfrey Spencer

    Trainer Tips · 9 minutes · 7/28/2010

    Ask the Trainer: Can you help me connect with my needs behind the protective use of force I use with my children?

  3. Connecting with Someone Who Has Cancer

    Connecting with Someone Who Has Cancer

    Godfrey Spencer

    Trainer Tips · 6 minutes · 7/28/2010

    Ask the Trainer: I feel overwhelmed thinking of writing to someone with cancer. What can I do?

  4. Meeting Needs While Caretaking

    Meeting Needs While Caretaking

    Godfrey Spencer

    Trainer Tips · 7 minutes · 7/28/2010

    Ask the Trainer: Can all needs be met when illness limits the capacity of one person to meet the needs of her partner?

  5. Use of Consequences to Change Behavior

    Use of Consequences to Change Behavior

    Godfrey Spencer

    Trainer Tips · 7 minutes · 7/28/2010

    Ask the Trainer: How do I respond to people who believe that consequences are necessary to change behavior?

  6. Judging Feelings

    Judging Feelings

    Godfrey Spencer

    Trainer Tips · 12 minutes · 7/28/2010

    Ask the Trainer: Is it a good idea to use NVC on persistent guilt, anger or depression without the aid of others?

  7. On Love and Empathy

    On Love and Empathy

    Godfrey Spencer

    Trainer Tips · 5 minutes · 7/28/2010

    Ask the Trainer: Is there any difference between the concept or experience of "love" and that of "empathy?"

  8. The Power of Gratitude

    The Power of Gratitude

    Jim & Jori Manske

    Video · 13 minutes · 11/15/2013

    Listen to Jim and Jori ask each other about the role of gratitude in their daily activities as they share how gratitude can be a primary tool to help us stay present and at peace.

  9. If you ask for or give empathy and are met with accusations of codependency, there are a number of things you can do to check that you are coming from a place of healthy differentiation. You can see if you're doing so from a place of healthy differentiation -- and notice signs of healthy differentiation when you offer empathy. You can also bring a profound respect for differences, and clear boundaries. Read on for more.

  10. Can I?

    Can I?

    Miki Kashtan

    Articles · 8 - 12 minutes · 10/18/2021

    Children often ask adults “Can I…?” This question is so common that we carry it with us into adulthood, often addressing each other in the same way -- and more so with those we see as authority figures. However, let's unpack how this phrasing can reaffirm power differences. And see how, instead, we can transform paradigms of power in a way that invites dialogue, and co-creates an outcome that we can mutually benefit from.

  11. Getting Out of Ourselves

    Getting Out of Ourselves

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 4/29/2015

    Trainer Tip: NVC asks us to be aware of our needs and discomfort is evidence of an unment need. However focusing on ourselves when we're uncomfortable isn't always the best choice.

  12. CNVC Certified Trainer Lore Baur asks: "Have you ever seen something happen that made you feel uncomfortable and you didn't know what to do?" That's the "bystander effect:" a well-researched and commonly experienced phenomenon. Training can help you overcome it, enabling you to discern what to do and how to support others in ways that reduce trauma and increase safety.

  13. If we're to have a better future, our biggest task will be to reexamine what the police are, their place in the system, and more. Police violence exists by systemic design. The myths of where the problems and symptoms lie with the police, capitalism, laws, government, citizens, class and racism --plus the relationship between all these-- is what keeps oppression ongoing on a mass scale. For change to happen, we'll need to find systemic leverage points, and use privilege to benefit those without it. Read on for more.

  14. Peace Starts At Home

    Peace Starts At Home

    (6 Session Course)

    Miki Kashtan

    Multi-session Course · 6 hours, 13 minutes · 11/4/2017

    Through your dialogues at home, where the stakes are often very high, you can increase your ability to meet the challenges of life everywhere with empathy, goodwill and authenticity. Please listen to this inspiring recorded telecourse with Miki Kashtan and learn how!

  15. I am not an angry person…

    I am not an angry person…

    Mary Mackenzie

    Peaceful Living Blog · ·

    Recently, I have been pondering anger, how I express it and the jackal story I tell myself about it. Marshall Rosenberg taught that anger is a natural emotion that is based on a judgment of someone else or myself. I agree with this, so I have been doing some “enemy images” and self-empathy work (and praying for those who are most likely to be the recipients of my anger). My goal was to clear my judgments and take responsibility for my “stuff.” It has helped a lot, and yet I still feel a general anger in me that is not directly related to anyone or any specific situation.
  16. Resistance

    Resistance

    John Kinyon

    Articles · 6 - 9 minutes · 2/16/2023

    There are many polarizing issues we can resist and fight over. The word "resistance" can mean fighting against what we don’t agree with in counterproductive ways. It can also be the illusion and futility of mentally fighting against reality of 'what is'. But acceptance, non-resistance, of what is doesn’t mean powerless resignation. Another way to resist is to accept and love whole-heartedly, with empathy and care for the people doing the things we are resisting.

  17. Much like other asymmetric relationships (such as therapist and client), there are complications related to power dynamics that can arise with any NVC trainer having sex with a participant. For one, there's (counter)transference. And there's potential for things that may not move outside this asymmetric relationship -- such as projections where the participant, and/or the trainer, is guided by un-healed pain of their "inner child".

  18. Expressing Big Emotions Compassionately

    Expressing Big Emotions Compassionately

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 2 - 3 minutes · 02/06/2024

    Trainer Tip: When we express frustration without blaming others and by clarifying our own needs and requests, we diminish the possibility of hurt feelings and separation in our relationships. So next time you feel very agitated or angry, rather than implying the other person is wrong or at fault, try the following: own your feelings, make a specific request, and rather than implying they need to give up their needs focus on your needs.

  19. Tips for the Road Series Tip 11

    Tips for the Road Series Tip 11

    Catching Hearts

    Eric Bowers

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 9/17/2017

    When we take a leap in life and put our hearts out into the world in new or bigger ways—sharing a song, dance, or poem, writing a book, competing at a sporting event, giving a speech, and so on—there is greater potential for aliveness but also for shame and pain

  20. Clarifying Our Requests to Meet Our Needs

    Clarifying Our Requests to Meet Our Needs

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 8/9/2014

    Trainer Tip: Clarifying our requests can make the difference between frustration and satisfaction, Mary shows you how.

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