Mediation is a great skill to have whether it's for your personal relationships or in the workplace. We look at four different techniques and their benefits in a role-play that takes place in an informal, unorganised setting.

This article explores ways of starting and maintaining NVC study groups and practice groups. It offers recommended reading support materials and poses questions to consider for structuring and organizing the group.

We're more likely to sacrifice trust, connection, and relationship quality when (1.) We use NVC to focus on being seen, understood, heard, or meeting our own needs in a way that eclipses our view and understanding of others needs; (2.) We don't clearly examine our intentions; and (3.) We use the NVC form so rigidly that it becomes difficult for others to connect with us authentically.

Is it dangerous for large numbers of people to be absorbing disturbing news alone? Given the intensity of our times, making choices based on conscious awareness and discernment in relation to current events is essential for our ability to stay engaged, and to also wisely meet our collective challenges with agency and power. Here are five tips for how to help stay sane in relation to the news...

Given all that we are facing today as a society and a species, amongst some of the things we need is a well nourished heart. To nourish our hearts we need to discern where to wisely put our attention. Here are three practices to reclaim your attention, and replenish your reserves, so that you have the inner resources to do the work that is calling you. They are: train the mind, nourish the...

Trainer Tip: Here are some options for tense moments in conversations: try a "redo", understand and recognize your habits, pause to regroup, empathize with the person so they feel heard, check your mind frame before speaking, and name some appreciations about one another.

Before you make a request you can connect fully to a time when your need was met. Notice how your request feels and sounds different from this place of aliveness. Excitement about meeting a need implies confidence and trust about moving forward together. Offer an invitation to find strategies that work for both of you.

To express opposition without stimulating distress, stop judging and look for ways to honor, understand, and have compassion for others. You can do this by finding a point of agreement. For example, you can agree with part of what they said. Or if you completely disagree, you can express what greater understanding, inspiration, appreciation or empathy you have in response to what they're...

Trainer Tip: Censoring oneself to maintain peace may seem easier, but it actually requires significant energy. You can free up that energy you use to deny and stuff down your feelings, needs, desires, truth, and figure out and adjust to what others want. Embracing authenticity and expressing true feelings and needs can lead to a liberating experience, unlocking joy, love, and endless...

Empathy is a form of attunement. Empathy is giving your compassionate curiosity by guessing another’s feelings and needs. Consider how you live or relate to each of these 12 essential aspects of empathy. Some of them mention how we can offer empathy without abandoning ourselves, how empathy isn't always the best response, and how "Empathy can be offered when you disagree with another’s opinion,...

Trainer Tip: "Power over" refers to using power, coercion, fear or authority to force change. It rarely brings lasting change. "Power with" refers to power that seeks to meet everyone’s needs. A "power with" system values input and needs of everyone who will be affected by decisions. When you notice you're using a power over paradigm to get results, shift focus to power with. Notice how this...

"Falling out of love" is a misleading concept that can lead to feelings of helplessness in relationships. The initial intense phase of love gradually gives way to the need for intentional effort and communication. Unrealistic relationship expectations can erode connection, causing the perception of falling out of love. To address this, we can ask key questions and seek clarity to attend to...

By guessing our child's feelings and needs we open the door to understanding what's behind their behavior, and can better suggest solutions that meet both their and our own needs. In this way we build trust and their desire to seek us out in times of need. Expressing our own feelings and needs also allows us to help them understand the value in fulfilling tasks or requests.

Trainer Tip: People sometimes say, “I didn’t do NVC this week.” Or “I tried NVC when I was in an argument last week.” NVC (AKA. Compassionate Communication) is not a thing to pull out of a bag of tricks once in a while. It is a way of living -- even as we may slip up, our goal is to more often handle situations with a consciousness of valuing connection and everyone’s needs more than being...

We can use anger as an important signal to let us know that we perceive a threat to a universal need or value, directing our attention to something so that we can take effective action, and avoid harmful thought patterns. For example, instead of dwelling on a "should," focus on addressing unmet needs through boundaries and effective communication.

Trainer Tip: Do you sometimes feel lonely and disconnected from others? If so, look at how you may be participating in supporting that outcome and what you can do differently. For instance, if you want support or connection - but prioritize looking composed no matter how sad, hurt or angry you feel, you may shield yourself from authentically and vulnerably asking those things. Instead, make...

Trainer Tip: Sometimes our actions keep us from meeting our needs. Let’s say you long for connection with others, but you are also afraid of it, so you push people away. Then you tell yourself that no one likes you, resulting in depression and self-criticism. Self-empathy can help clarify what we truly want rather than focusing on what is wrong with others or ourselves, and help us align in...

Trainer Tip: When there is conflict, the chances are good that people are arguing over a particular strategy. When we focus on our needs, the opportunities for peaceful resolution that values everyone’s needs are much greater. This can also build trust. Be aware of opportunities to shift focus from strategies to needs. Read on for an example of how this can work.

Trainer Tip: Ask someone what they enjoy about you being in their life. For example, “Would you tell me 3 specific reasons you enjoy having me in your life?” To a vague reply like, “Oh, you know I love you. I just like spending time with you.” Or, “You’re one of my best employees!” ask for more specificity (eg. “Can you tell me what I do and what needs it meets that makes me one of your best...

When supporting someone with less privilege, first check with them how you can support. If you're reacting more strongly to their undesirable experience than they are, this then shifts the dynamic so that they're setting aside what they want to attend to your feelings and needs - this may become work that they didn't sign up for. Read on for what to do instead to support more equity.