NVC Resources on Requests
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What do you do when you are thinking that it's not "emotionally safe" to speak honestly? Join CNVC Certified Trainer Arnina Kashtan as she explores this topic with a workshop participant.
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The Art of Listening
Kathleen Macferran at TEDx Ranier
In this thought provoking talk, Kathleen Macferran explores the power of listening to open doors and potentially to transform people. This talk was given at a local TEDx event, produced independently of the TED Conferences.
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Mediate Your Life
Chooser Educator Map
When you have intrusive thoughts about yourself and feel ‘crummy,’ Ike recommends using the Chooser / Educator map as a guide to lead you out of the primitive part of your brain and back to your prefrontal cortex. Both the Chooser and the Educator want to contribute to your well being, but in different ways. This map facilitates having a positive conversation with them.
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CNVC Certified Trainer Miki Kashtan shares how Marshall Rosenberg helped her see how unacknowledged fear can be misinterpreted as aggression and offers an elegant and simple strategy for changing this dynamic.
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CNVC Certified Trainer Miki Kashtan explains how using OFNR or "Classic NVC" is for practice, not real life situations.
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CNVC Certified Trainer Miki Kashtan discusses how focusing on connection and care can guide us in expressing honestly and offering empathy.
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CNVC Certified Trainer Miki Kashtan explains how NVC's OFNR process is a tool to train our consciousness, rather than the "correct" way to speak.
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The impulse to say "I love you" is an opportunity to check-in both with our level of presence (eg. are we saying it by rote?) and also with what we really mean in that moment (eg. what are the needs and real purpose deep beneath the word "love"?). This can invite us to explore a deeper, more heartfelt way of communicating and being...
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Trainer Tip: One of the basic philosophies of Nonviolent Communication is valuing everyone’s needs equally. That means that you consider your needs to be equal to another person’s needs. If someone asks you for empathy, and you choose to empathize at you own expense, you're not living in a Nonviolent Communication consciousness. Be aware of your own needs today when someone asks you to be their emotional support.
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Misunderstandings can be painful. We can easily avoid this by checking what the other person understood from what we said, and ask the other person to do the same. Doing this is especially important when it comes to planning, shared decision-making, and when emotions are strong. Also, the more someone knows you, the more they think they already know what you mean -- which can get in the way of really hearing you. Here are a variety of ways to approach this simple strategy.