Search the NVC Library

There are many polarizing issues we can resist and fight over. The word "resistance" can mean fighting against what we don’t agree with in counterproductive ways. It can also be the illusion and futility of mentally fighting against reality of 'what is'. But acceptance, non-resistance, of what is doesn’t mean powerless resignation. Another way to resist is to accept and love whole-heartedly, with empathy and care for the people doing the things we are resisting.

Among NVC practitioners, empathy can be superficial. How open are you to being influenced by what others are saying? Do you reflect back and then guard and remain within your position of being right, even as you say otherwise? Only when we're eager to be influenced by what they say can we connect, expand our world and thus, shift the field. Without such openness we fool ourselves into thinking we are truly empathic listeners.

Roxy Manning emphasizes positive relationships in parenting, highlighting acceptance, understanding, and compromise. She stresses the importance of being aware of one's needs, attuning to the other person's needs, fostering trust, and encouraging open communication, especially with children. The approach involves a balance between meeting both sets of needs for a healthier dynamic.

Ask the Trainer: "I understand that I'm not responsible for someone else's feelings, but my girlfriend doesn't. Do you have ideas for how I could get her to understand this concept?"

Come fall in love with yourself again…

In this course recording, facilitated by Arnina Kashtan, you will discover your ability to...

• Simply love yourself…
• Live fully and express your greatness in the world… and
• Shorten the way to realizing your true self!

Arnina will share with you the deepest process of self-connection and meaningful discovery. You will learn how to listen to your innermost self, discover how to lead a life that is much more than anything you have ever dreamed of, and fall in love with yourself all over again!

Come. Let us journey together into our own authentic Life force: the essential living energy that permeates all of our lives.

Your journey will begin at the center: with the divine / life force, or soul force.

Robert Gonzales shares how this fundamental life energy is the tender expression of your inner being, or soul. It unfolds through the heart as your deepest longings, which manifest themselves in all forms of human needs and values. When you live from the energies of compassion, creativity, love, and clarity – while remaining wholly grounded and aware of needs and values – then you are living your passion… You are living the Self-In-Life.

In this 6-session course Sarah Peyton will take you through the 5 levels of unconscious contracts that can create patterns of self-sabotage and self-defeat. Each session introduces a different unconscious contract based on various aspects of relational neuroscience and provides support for the release of these contracts. 

Sarah Peyton shows you how, with deep empathy, self-accompaniment, and an understanding of neuroscience, you can free yourself from your original constraints. 

It can be bewildering to be human.

We can make so many choices that are not good for us. Why do we persist in habits, incapacities or self-judgments that are harmful to our long-term well-being? 

The answer to this question is surprising – it is usually either love – or - paradoxically, survival!

Love is at the root of self-sabotage.

Though we often aren't aware of it, our nervous systems are essentially still paired with our earliest caregivers and often related to how we responded as a child. Our first interactions shape us in ways that can limit our life energy.

This handout defines and contrasts "empathy" alongside "responses may meet needs, but are not empathy" (such as advice, correcting, consoling, etc).

Being heard is a core human need. But what if you don't like what the other person is saying: how do you hold onto your awareness of their humanity? Find out in this demonstration from Kathy Simon's course, Connect Across Differences.

Trainer tip: The phrase “tragic expressions of unmet needs” is used to convey how often we do things that aren’t likely to meet our needs. It’s not bad, it’s tragic -- because it won’t help us meet our needs. Acknowledging this, we can then consider a different approach that's more likely to lead to satisfying results. Read on for three examples of where this may apply in your life.

Trainer Tip: Strive for win-win resolutions where no one loses. Try this rather than deciding things by the majority or compromise, where one or more parties feel dissatisfied with the resolution because it involves an element of giving in. An alternative is shifting; both people connect to the needs they are trying to meet, and in doing so, one person makes an honest shift to contribute to the other person’s needs and life.

Ask the Trainer: "I just started teaching in a public school and I'm not enjoying the violence that teachers express towards children and their colleagues. However, when I talk about NVC, most people listen but I feel they're either not understanding it or ..."

Bridget Belgrave, CNVC Certified Trainer from the United Kingdom, talks with an interviewer after he attends an NVC and Dance Floors workshop with her. The interviewer shares his reaction to the term "Nonviolent Communication."

In this inspiring video, Robert Gonzales, veteran CNVC Certified Trainer, talks about his personal search to integrate spirituality into his daily life, and how Nonviolent Communication provided the missing link for this integration and has become the focus of his work.

• Discover how to be radically honest without pushing “the other” away
• Learn to ask firmly and gracefully for what you want, hear ‘NO,’ and stay alive
• Explore how the power of empathy dissolves anger, pain, and fear
• Discern the essence of what others say, no matter how it is expressed

In this compelling dialogue, veteran CNVC Certified Trainers, Susan Skye and Mary Mackenzie, discuss the intrinsic needs present in addictive behaviors, and how Nonviolent Communication aligns with the 12-step programs’ process for treating addiction.

The wisdom which NVC is based on is as old as humanity itself. This telecourse recording draws insights from NVC’s elder siblings of Taoism, Buddhism and indigenous culture to offer new ways of approaching common NVC ‘stuck’ places.

If role play, hearing conversations modeled and dialogue practice is how you learn, this is the telecourse recording for you! Learn the art of entering, staying in and bowing out of the conversational dance using real-life situations.

Workplace relationships are complex. Each employee brings their unique self to work. Their background, perspective, emotional triggers, and working style. Add to this the dynamics of power relations, and the fact that often workplace communication now takes place at our computer keyboards rather than face-to-face. Sylvia Haskvitz offers practical tips to make today's complex workplace relationships more satisfying and effective.