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NVC Resources on Observation

  1. Longing For The Company Of Not-Knowers

    Longing For The Company Of Not-Knowers

    Robert Maoz Krzisnik

    Articles · 3 - 5 minutes · 8/21/2023

    How excited do you get about connecting with people who are proving themselves right and who act like they know it all? Do you prefer the company of not-knowers who are in awe of the mystery of life and exploring with humility and innocent curiosity? Masking our vulnerability in not-knowing can point to deep wounds inside us, where perhaps the common denominator is our desire to prove our worth.

  2. How Anger Can Help or Hinder

    How Anger Can Help or Hinder

    LaShelle Lowe-Chardé

    Practice Exercises · 2 - 3 minutes · 9/25/2023

    We can use anger as an important signal to let us know that we perceive a threat to a universal need or value, directing our attention to something so that we can take effective action, and avoid harmful thought patterns. For example, instead of dwelling on a "should," focus on addressing unmet needs through boundaries and effective communication.

  3. Tools for Mindfulness of Impact in Dialogue

    Tools for Mindfulness of Impact in Dialogue

    LaShelle Lowe-Chardé

    Practice Exercises · 4 - 6 minutes · 8/27/2023

    If you want a better connection it's crucial to be mindful about how your communication affects your partner. This means noticing and keeping eye contact, observing body language, and checking for their reactions. You can also share in small increments, check in before sharing vulnerable thoughts, and express what you notice. Give yourself empathy when you notice that you want to be right more than you’re wanting to be connected.

  4. Much like other asymmetric relationships (such as therapist and client), there are complications related to power dynamics that can arise with any NVC trainer having sex with a participant. For one, there's (counter)transference. And there's potential for things that may not move outside this asymmetric relationship -- such as projections where the participant, and/or the trainer, is guided by un-healed pain of their "inner child".

  5. Cooperating with the Life Principle

    Cooperating with the Life Principle

    Living the Heart of Life Unfolding (8 Session Course)

    Robert Gonzales

    Multi-session Course · 6 hours · 11/19/2014

    If you're interested in learning specifically how and what you can do to live compassionately – with plenty of hands-on practice time – this course is for you. Observe actual demonstrations of Robert guiding participants through the transformational territory of healing and integration.

  6. Living the Self-in-Life

    Living the Self-in-Life

    Presence and Self-Compassion

    Robert Gonzales

    Audio · 30 minutes · 10/1/2016

    During this very moving session, you'll dive into Robert's exercises for supporting connection to your true self as opposed to your conditioned self.

  7. Resistance

    Resistance

    John Kinyon

    Articles · 6 - 9 minutes · 2/16/2023

    There are many polarizing issues we can resist and fight over. The word "resistance" can mean fighting against what we don’t agree with in counterproductive ways. It can also be the illusion and futility of mentally fighting against reality of 'what is'. But acceptance, non-resistance, of what is doesn’t mean powerless resignation. Another way to resist is to accept and love whole-heartedly, with empathy and care for the people doing the things we are resisting.

  8. Parenting with Flexibility

    Parenting with Flexibility

    Letting Go of Control and Attuning to Your Child's Needs

    Roxy Manning

    Video · 2 min 50 sec · 04/28/2024

    Roxy Manning discusses the tendency to get attached to certain parenting strategies for control and emphasizes the importance of attuning to the child's needs rather than imposing fixed ideas of right or wrong. Using a personal example of being labeled a "bad child" for taking off uncomfortable dresses, Roxy highlights the need to observe and understand the child's perspective. She stresses the importance of moving away from rigid ideas about the perfect strategy and instead focusing on what is happening in the moment to better address both the child's and the parent's needs. Roxy encourages flexibility in parenting strategies and urges parents to check in on their motivations for seeking control.

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