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  1. Living Peacefully

    Living Peacefully

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 12/5/2022

    Trainer Tip: When we match might with might, we create discord, frustration, and separation from other people. Instead, place aside your urge to be right or to win. Approach charged situations with a sincere desire to be honest, and to value everyone’s needs including your own. The way you show up is a valuable asset. You may not get what you asked for but you can increase your chances of meeting your needs for integrity, and more.

  2. Observing Reality

    Observing Reality

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 3/6/2023

    Trainer Tip: Notice when you create stories about why something occurred. Commit to only observing facts. Then make decisions that are likely to give you relief and joy. For instance, if someone is late you may think that she’s inconsiderate or values another thing more than you. Instead, observe what you know—that she's later than agreed. From there, you could call her to find out what’s going on.

  3. Focusing On What You Want

    Focusing On What You Want

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 6/10/2023

    Trainer Tip: It can be more productive and satisfying to focus on what we want than on what we don’t have or don’t like. What will help rectify the situation? What would you like someone to do now or next time? This can eliminate much of the emotional pain caused by berating yourself or others. The moment your focus is on what is wrong with your life or what's lacking, take a moment to shift it to what you want.

  4. Control

    Control

    John Kinyon

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 3/3/2023

    Control may help us feel safe in an unpredictable, unsafe, wild world. Wanting control may be a response to shielding ourselves from feeling fear and being aware of our vulnerability. The more we insulate from fear, discomfort, and vulnerability, the more we are cut off from aliveness; we can become more anxious, and depressed. The more we control the more we are disconnected from empathy and care. With aliveness come joy, peace, love, awe.

  5. Mindfulness

    Mindfulness

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 1/6/2024

    Trainer Tip: Mindfulness, focusing on what's happening now, is the foundation of Compassionate Communication. The more present we are, the greater the chance we will be aware of our needs and meet them, thus the greater opportunity for joy. Connect to your feelings and needs at least four times today. Notice how differently you conduct your day when you are mindful.

  6. Choosing Whom We Empathize With

    Choosing Whom We Empathize With

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 10/24/2019

    Trainer Tip: One of the basic philosophies of Nonviolent Communication is valuing everyone’s needs equally. That means that you consider your needs to be equal to another person’s needs. If someone asks you for empathy, and you choose to empathize at you own expense, you're not living in a Nonviolent Communication consciousness. Be aware of your own needs today when someone asks you to be their emotional support.

  7. Aligning Our Strategies with Our Values

    Aligning Our Strategies with Our Values

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 1/19/2020

    Trainer Tip: What do you value the most? Take a look at your actions and notice the values that your actions demonstrate (not what you want them to show, but what they do show), and see if they are in alignment.   Where there is a gap take steps to create actions that are in alignment with your values.

  8. Getting Out of Ourselves

    Getting Out of Ourselves

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 4/29/2015

    Trainer Tip: NVC asks us to be aware of our needs and discomfort is evidence of an unment need. However focusing on ourselves when we're uncomfortable isn't always the best choice.

  9. In this book excerpt, Kathleen and Jared offer a path to reach deeper clarity, distinguishing between freedom and submission / rebellion.

  10. Communicating Our Deepest Desires

    Communicating Our Deepest Desires

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 6/26/2021

    Trainer Tip: When we "protect" ourselves by not asking for what we want, we block ourselves from getting our needs met. From here, disappointment and resentment can build -- especially if this is a pattern. Instead, notice when you're tempted to do this, and be honest and upfront about what you want to improve the quality of your relationships.

  11. Enriching Life

    Enriching Life

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 1/2/2023

    Trainer Tip: If you are motivated by fear, guilt, blame or shame, your actions will usually be motivated by avoiding pain. The best way to experience permanent, lifelong change is to focus on how your life will improve when you make a change. Notice when you attempt to motivate yourself and others with guilt, blame, or shame today, and then look for motivations that enrich life instead.

  12. Empathy Hacking

    Empathy Hacking

    Dian Killian

    Downloadable Courses · ·

    • Make use of felt-sense and somatic awareness to support faster and deeper shifts in yourself and others
    • Master silent empathy to give more ease and flow in your empathy guessing
    • "Streetify" your NVC practice by learning how to make your NVC practice more fluent, colloquial, and "natural" and match the person you're speaking with
    • De-mystify empathy guessing by learning to identify key linguistic queues
    • Build an "emergency empathy" tool kit---with "quick fixes" for challenging situations by using each step of the model for maximum effectiveness
    • Interplay both the NVC "mindset" (consciousness/intention) and the NVC "tool kit" for greater ease, fluency and effectiveness
  13. Naturalizing NVC Language

    Naturalizing NVC Language

    7 Session Course

    Miki Kashtan

    Multi-session Course · 8 - 10 hours · 11/15/2022

    Learn to speak NVC using your own voice and increase ease and flow in all your personal and professional conversations. This 7-session telecourse recording with renowned trainer Miki Kashtan is designed to help you integrate NVC into all aspects of your life by gaining fluency in your practice of NVC and by embodying the principles regardless of the words you use. This course is based on intensive practice and coaching with real-life examples from participants’ lives.

    • Learn the complexities of intersectionality 
    • Gain a deeper understanding of the affects of differing life experiences
    • Clear the way for a more authentic connection
    • Deepen your ability to hold others in compassion
  14. Empathy Hacking

    Empathy Hacking

    Streamline your NVC Practice: 6 Session Course

    Dian Killian

    Multi-session Course · 6 hours · 6/10/2025

    Learn to listen with presence and power and gain tools to transform conflict in any situation.

  15. In this insightful snippet from Sarah Peyton, discover how connecting requests can transform conversations into meaningful exchanges. Referred to as the "steering wheel" of NVC dialogue, connecting requests shift the focus from action to connection, creating clarity and understanding.
  16. Noticing What Is Important

    Noticing What Is Important

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 6/10/2019

    Trainer Tip: Where do you focus most of your life? Are there areas that you could reassess? Are you happy? Engage a new paradigm shift in your life.

  17. Enjoying Your Life

    Enjoying Your Life

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 12/24/2022

    Trainer Tip: The surest way to enjoy life is to do things that meet your needs. If you don’t enjoy a particular activity, consider the need you hope to meet by doing it. For instance, for each item you want to do consider the needs you're trying to meet. Connect to the joy of that need. Then for each ask: “How would I feel if I delayed finishing this item?”. Consider which items you want to continue, pause, or reprioritize. This can help increase life enjoyment.

  18. Taking Responsibility for Our Actions

    Taking Responsibility for Our Actions

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 8/8/2015

    Trainer Tip: Mary shares an experience about accepting responsibility for her actions and how that lead her to greater choice and freedom.

  19. Taking Responsibility For Our Requests

    Taking Responsibility For Our Requests

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 7/7/2023

    Trainer Tip: It's important to design requests to fit specific needs. Otherwise people may do exactly what you ask and still, your needs may not get met. Before you make a request of someone, notice if the strategy you are considering is likely to meet your needs. If not, consider making a different request that may be more satisfying to you.

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