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You may want to shift power dynamics in intimate and family relationships -- especially if there's longstanding, unprocessed hurts. Reflect on where, when and with whom you tend to enter reactive “power over” patterns. Explore the feelings and needs that are up for you in those contexts. Imagine other ways that could meet your needs in, or before, those moments. In this way, in similar situations you can have more access to choice.

If you want a better connection it's crucial to be mindful about how your communication affects your partner. This means noticing and keeping eye contact, observing body language, and checking for their reactions. You can also share in small increments, check in before sharing vulnerable thoughts, and express what you notice. Give yourself empathy when you notice that you want to be right more than you’re wanting to be connected.

When you experience an emotion, your body send a message to your brain that lights up the amygdala. Then what? Listen as Sarah Peyton demonstrates the NVC practice of Naming the Feeling and Need, which calms the amygdala and enables you to move into relational space.