NVC Resources on Honesty

Does the thought of asking the following question stop you cold? "Would you tell me what you heard me say?" Mary Mackenzie, CNVC Certified Trainer known for her colloquial method of speaking and teaching NVC, offers a simpler method.

Trainer Tip: "Sometimes we are dissatisfied in our primary relationship, yet the thought of making a change is scary, so we stay in it. Sometimes we think we're afraid to learn the truth, so we don't ask direct questions."

Trainer Tip: Have you ever noticed how often we back up when we find ourselves in a conflict? Or how much we try to pull away when someone is angry or in emotional pain?

Trainer Tip: The ways that we interact with our children shape the way they will interact in their world. How do your actions model compassion, tolerance, and love for your children?

Trainer Tip: Accepting our true feelings, needs and values can lead us to a more compassionate life. Are you being true to yourself?

Trainer Tip: Anger can be an opportunity to hear the "Please" behind the words and create a path to resolve conflicts compassionately.

Trainer Tip: When someone is in pain and lashing out, might be a time when empathy is needed most. Empathizing in these moments can be very challenging. Mary offers a few words of ecouragement for these situations.

Trainer Tip: Most of us have been conditioned to withhold the expression of our feelings to some degree. Mary offers a tip to de-stigmatize our feelings and relax into our humanness.

Trainer Tip: Mary explains the NVC principle known as the "protective use of force."

Trainer Tip: Mary explains how Nonviolent Communication, a process that distinguishes needs from strategies is also itself, a strategy.

Trainer Tip: Clarifying our requests can make the difference between frustration and satisfaction, Mary shows you how.

Trainer Tip: Mary shares how staying present to our anger and finding the underlying feelings and needs can lead to deeper connection and more satisfying outcomes.

Trainer Tip: The question is not what other people think of you, but what you think of yourself. Who are you, really? Take a moment to consider what you value.

Trainer Tip: The exchange of resources, that is, exchanging money for an item or service, is enhanced and better appreciated when we are connected to its personal value rather than its cost.

Trainer Tip: Ready to start a fight because you're right? Consider another strategy.

Trainer Tip: There's one sure way to find hidden assumptions, stop and check it out!

Trainer Tip: When we connect our feelings to our needs, we put ourselves in a postion to get our needs met and mourn when they aren't met. Here's a practical tip you can practice daily to improve the quality of your life.

Trainer Tip: Q: How do we get the love we want? A: Ask for it.

Trainer Tip: Q: How do we get the love we want? A: Ask for it.

Trainer Tip: When do we move from using the formal 4-step process of NVC to a more idiomatic, natural-sounding expression? Whenever we're ready!